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Breastfeeding: Some useful tips and insights

General Thoughts, Pregnancy and Parenting, Published Articles, Reshma's Blog

Some women in urban areas, including Bangalore, aren’t just willing to continue with breastfeeding babies for long. Why? Are their fears valid, or solvable? Here’s an insight into the issue.

The world recently observed breastfeeding week, to spread awareness on the importance of breastfeeding babies. In Bangalore too there were several awareness campaigns, seminars, rallies, advertisements and related promotions.

The government has for sometime been campaigning aggressively on malnutrition and importance of breastfeeding through a series of advertisements with film actor Aamir Khan as the ambassador. Experts however are pointing to a declining graph among educated women on the willingness to breastfeed their babies even for first six months.

Why unwillingness to feed the baby?

Breastfeeding a baby brings its own set of ‘problems’ which many new moms find tough to deal with. Not able to dress up as they want to, need to maintain nutritious diet besides the need to shed weight, problem of leaking milk, the stress of work that makes it tough to reach home at a fixed time etc. are some problems that bother new mothers.

However, all these problems can be overcome with some tactical planning and personal care, provided the new mom has the willpower to continue with breastfeeding the baby.

Dr. Asha Benakappa, a paediatrician and lactation consultant, says: “Breastfeeding is a skill. It needs to be learnt quickly by a new mother. A mother needs to be firm on the decision to breastfeed as long as she can. At least for first six months, a baby needs to be fed exclusively by breast milk. Unfortunately very few educated mothers are encouraged or show the willingness to breastfeed their babies.

Mother is the only one who can ensure the well-being of a newborn. File pic.

Not enough milk?

Many of these women want ease and convenience in feeding patterns. Again many are under this myth of ‘I do not have enough milk.’ Dr.Asha says that if a newborn, except for the first three days after birth, urinates at least six times a day, it means the baby is getting sufficient milk.

Says Dr. Anitha K. Mohan, Consultant Obstetrician at Fortis hospital, Bannerghatta road: “Lack of milk supply in the new mother should be judged by the specialist and not by relatives or by the mother herself. Breastfeeding is not only easy but also the best nutrition for a newborn baby. While there are enough advertisements promoting breast feeding, many urban women do not know the technique. This has to be seriously thought about and addressed by experts.”

Dr. Ravneet Joshi, paediatric and lactation consultant at Manipal hospitals says: “Fortunately in my professional life, I have come across educated young women who want to do their best for the child. The concern of not having enough milk in the mother is related to control of demand. So if a mother nurses often, she will have enough milk supply. She can prevent other problems too if the breast milk is getting drained in adequate quantity.”

Encouraging working women to breastfeed, Dr. Ravneet adds, “Working women should start practicing expressing milk and storing it to feed the baby at least 15 days before they begin work. Increase night-time feeds to have good milk production. However as many would be aware, direct breastfeeding is anytime better than expressed milk as it keeps the mother and baby in close contact.”

What increases breast milk supply?

Try these tips!

  1. There are natural vegetables that induce more milk supply. Various melons including Bottle Guard or Lauki, green leaf vegetables like Sabbasige soppu (Dil – Anethum graveolens) help in milk production, without any odour or side-effect.
  2. If you are a working mother and want to breastfeed your child, time your liquid intake in such a way that milk is produced at the time when you are ready to feed. This means lesser liquid intake during day time.
  3. More liquid intake means more milk. Drinking milk enriches breast milk with more nutrients and calcium.
  4. It is natural that one breast produces more milk, while the other has less. Don’t worry about this.
  5. When breasts are hardened, a hot pack (very hot water inside a rubber bag) carefully given by placing cloth on the skin, helps express extra milk and helps you become normal. If you bear the pain and do nothing, it will lead to fever, lumps and serious medical conditions.
  6. There are lanolin-based creams available in medicals, to treat sore nipples

In her book written on the subject, ‘Breastfeeding-the basic instinct,’ Dr. Asha Benakappa says, “Adequate nutrition, frequent suckling and emotional support are the physiological ways to increase milk production.”

Ginger, garlic, mint, jaggery, dates may be a good diet to be incorporated in the mother’s food plan. however, doctors caution on relying only on foods to encourage mothers. Dr. Asha says a mother should never be made to feel that she will not be able to lactate or that her milk will not be good unless she consumes a particular food.

Breast milk flows naturally from a woman’s body soon after childbirth.  Women need to accept the breast milk it as the only diet to feed their babies and avoid formula milk.

You are working. How can you breastfeed baby?

Dr. Anitha advises, “Some foods like garlic, methi (fenugreek) and oats help mothers to produce more milk. Working professionals too must breastfeed their babies. Women must avail of special leave or flexible work hours to facilitate at least 6 months of exclusive breast feeding. Expressed breast milk is the next best option to direct breastfeeding and must be taught to all mothers. Once breast milk is expressed, it can be kept at room temperature for six hours. This can be given to the baby with a spoon, without heating it or adding anything.”

Says Poornima Sharma, a mother to a three-month old infant, “There is a huge lack of awareness on how to help the baby latch on, hardened breasts and other concerns among new mothers. The consulting obstetrician can play a good role in guiding and counselling new mothers. I could not breastfeed my first baby in the beginning, but I was counseled and encouraged by my doctor. Thankfully, now I do not have any problem in breastfeeding my baby.”

On primary concerns among new mothers during the breastfeeding phase, Dr. Anitha says, “Sore nipples happen because of poor “latch-on” technique. If larger part of the areola (dark area around  the nipple) is in the baby’s mouth during breast feeding, baby gets enough milk and sore nipples do not happen. After breastfeeding, the mother can apply a drop of her breast milk on the sore nipples and allow them to air dry.  This helps healing the soreness.”

A few tips for a cherished breastfeeding phase

  • Have an early check-up at your hospital post-delivery to clear doubts with the concerned obstetrician or lactation consultant. It is advisable to solve problems at this stage like sore nipples, engorgement of breasts, inability to feed from the second breast and so on.
  • Make sure to give the baby -colostrum (first milk) produced by the lactating mother. This should be initiated soon after childbirth or if it is a caesarean delivery, as soon as possible.
  • Regular expression of breast milk (every three hours) will prevent leaking and maintain milk production.
  • Mood swings, hormonal changes are natural during post delivery stage– do not give up breastfeeding due to these reasons.
  • Talk to other mothers who have delivered recently and find out how you can cope with the challenges the new phase brings.
  • Once a baby is on bottle feed, it is difficult to get the baby to switch to breast feeding, so be careful before you take the decision.
  • Plan your career to get back to work after a year of baby’s age or try work-from-home option. Discuss your maternity leave well in advance with the employer to have clarity on the issue.
  • Feeding expressed milk can be done with a palada/a cup or through a spoon. Do not feed expressed milk using a bottle as it can cause nipple confusion with babies.
  • When trying to break away from the feeding baby, insert a finger in its mouth and then separate yourself, in order to avoid a sore nipple and cranky baby.
  • Lactating mothers can use breast pads to prevent milk stains from showing. One can use folded handkerchiefs or absorbent materials inside the bra and change them often.
  • Do not hurry on introducing other foods in the baby’s diet. Talk to your paediatrician when to wean the baby.
  • Avoid giving a pacifier if possible to the baby.
  • Prevent engorged breasts with regular nursing and get it treated soon through immediate remedies as advised by your doctor.
  • Doctors worldwide these days are discouraging feeding cow’s milk to babies below one year, as it leads to respiratory problems in the baby and mucus production.

Mother’s milk is the best

Lactation consultant at Cloudnine, Ruth Patterson says: “One doesn’t find a rural mother taking help of an obstetrician or lactation consultant for breast feeding. It is something she has always seen and grown up with. Urban women are educated but they have no time, patience, have huge disposable incomes so they easily give in to bottle feeding. For working women, expressed milk option is the best one to ensure the baby is on a right diet.”

Breastfeeding has a number of advantages for the baby and the mother. Fewer incidences of breast and cervical cancer have been found in women who breastfeed babies until one year or longer. Due to natural method of calories being shed out, new mothers are able to lose weight easily in breastfeeding phase when combined with regular exercise.

Babies who are breastfed are healthier, have lesser digestion problems and better immunity. Experts say women right from early pregnancy should read books on post delivery and have practical idea of taking care of a little one who is going to be completely dependent on the mother. Lactation experts advise mothers to breastfeed 12 to 14 times a day as per demand of the baby. Finally they have a word of advice- Do not fret of losing some sleep for a few months.

Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma lives in Bangalore and loves reading and writing on society and changing lifestyles.
This article was published on Citizen Matters home page website on August 12th 2013.

What to look for in a maternity hospital?

General Thoughts, Pregnancy and Parenting, Published Articles, Reshma's Blog

How do you select the hospital in which you welcome your baby? What to pack for the hospital stay? What care should be taken?

You have endured the tension those nine months could cause, and experienced the joy that lies in the anticipation of becoming a new parent. However, have you chosen the right place to welcome the young one?

Yes, it is important. Choosing a hospital where the would-be-mom is comfortable is of utmost importance and should be planned in advance.

While some of the would-be-moms choose to be with one hospital right through their pregnancy, there are a few who end up delivering at a different hospital with a different obstetrician, as they change doctors or hospitals towards the end of the pregnancy.

Reasons for this vary. It can be due to factors like complications that can arise during pregnancy where a specialised obstetrician at another hospital needs to be consulted; or due to women spending the last trimester at their maternal home and choosing a hospital nearby for delivery.

Treating a newborn with care is essential, for which the hospital should be equipped. Pic: Nagachandrika Bhat

What to look for while choosing a hospital

In any case, choose a hospital that has a team equipped to handle birth of a baby efficiently. Examine all facilities required to deliver a healthy baby with no complications. This is important, as the would-be mom has to be healthy and has to be in a safe environment.

Giving birth to a baby is a time-tested natural process. It is therefore important to choose a hospital or an obstetrician who believes in encouraging women to go through natural deliveries, unless a medical condition dictates a caesarean delivery.

Says Dr. Fatima Poonawala of Alfa Clinic, “A good hospital or a good doctor’s credit in case of deliveries lies in facilitating natural deliveries for moms-to-be in a safe environment so that the mother and the baby can be safe. One needs to have a check on the credentials of the obstetrician, how long the obstetrician has been practicing and availability of the doctor in one or two hospitals. Also it is advisable to see an obstetrician with a birth plan and discuss fears, concerns or any apprehensions during one’s consultations to be comfortable on the final delivery process.”

Poonam Bhandari, a mom to one-year-old Jia, says, “It is of immense value to have the comfort level with the gynaecologist you will be seeing through your pregnancy. I was looking at a hospital that adhered to basic cleanliness, had NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) as I knew I will be having a premature baby and a doctor who could patiently listen and understand my concerns.”

According to Dr. Anu Sridhar, Consultant Obstetrician and Gynaecologist at Fortis Hospitals, Bannerghatta Road, “Good maternity hospitals should have maternity set-up in the form of fully functional labour unit with trained staff and doctors specialised in Obstetrics. It also requires 24-hour anesthesiologist, pediatricians, OT and blood bank. “

Yoga during pregnancy
Says Vaishnavi S, yoga expert at Rangadurai hospital, Basavanagudi: “Women should understand that they need to be fit during pregnancy and yoga plays an important role in helping would-be-mothers in pre-natal and post-natal care. The body becomes more flexible to adapt various positions in labour and again helps mothers to get back into shape post-delivery. Again problems like excessive bleeding, loss of bladder control can be addressed through yoga.”

A few pointers to consider when choosing a maternity hospital

Your comfort with your Obstetrician: In your first few meetings with your obstetrician and gynaecologist, you will be able to gauge if your doctor has time and patience to answer your questions calmly. Obviously you want to be with an obstetrician who can make you feel comfortable about your pregnancy, help you build that trust and give the assurance he or she will be with you to handle any concern during pregnancy.

Credentials of the obstetrician and ability to handle complex deliveries: It is essential to choose a hospital and a doctor who has a philosophy and attitude towards birthing that matches with yours. If yours is a normal pregnancy with no other ailments like overweight, diabetes etc., then you have more options on choice of hospital ranging from basic to luxury ones. However if you have any ailment, it is advisable to approach an obstetrician who has experience in handling complex pregnancies, regardless of other facilities like AC rooms and other pampering which is optional for moms-to-be who want to cherish this phase.

Transparent attitude: Again it is important for your obstetrician to be open and talk to you about all stages during your pregnancy. Even in the case of a complication, your obstetrician should be able to take you through with confidence and ensure the best is done regarding the pregnancy and baby.

Availability of NICU and adult ICU at the hospital: Most deliveries happen without requiring the baby to be placed in Neo-natal Intensive Care Units (NICU). However if you do not want the last–minute shift in transfer of baby or mother for a critic condition (which is rare, but can happen) then you can choose a hospital that has both NICU and adult ICU at the hospital.

Proximity to your home: Choose a hospital that is near to your home, as right through the pregnancy there would be many check-ups and routine tests. Shorter the distance, easier it would be for you. However according to Dr. Fatima, the distance does not really matter regarding birth of a child as long as one is taken care under a good obstetrician.

Feedback from various sources: Make it a point to obtain feedback on the doctor, nursing team and hospital in general from various sources like relatives or friends, online feedback etc. and then decide.

Hospital Care during night hours, holidays and emergencies: It is very important for a would-be mother to consider emergencies, and check if there would be sufficient staff during odd hours. Also discuss with your doctor during the later stages of pregnancy – how soon can she be with you when the labour pain begins, so that you know your lead time before your doctor takes charge of your delivery.

Other added factors that can help you make the final choice

  • Availability of a pediatrician at the hospital.
  • Fitness programs like aerobics, yoga which can help in smooth pregnancy phase and even in post-natal care.
  • Courteousness of staff like the reception and at the general attitude and approach of nursing towards moms-to-be.
  • Cleanliness, hygiene maintained at operation theatres, NICU, and Labour Recovery Room- the room where you will spend the three days with your baby. You may not choose a fancy boutique hospital but do check on hygiene and basic facilities that can help you go through the birthing process smoothly.
  • Availability of Lactation Consultant, Nutritionist and a Physiotherapist at the hospital
  • Whether you want your partner to be with you in the labour room and does your hospital support that opinion.
  • Availability of 24X7 hot water. Traditionally a new mom is not supposed to touch cold water. Bangalore is known for its cold weather, so hot water is a must for both baby and the new mom.

To wrap up, choose a hospital where you feel as a gut-feeling that you and your baby will be taken care well at the hospital. Good Luck to step into happy motherhood.

What to pack for the D-day?

(Do check with your hospital what essentials do they provide to moms-to-be. There are quite a few hospitals now, who provide a lot of essentials along with additional pampering.)

For the Mother-to-be

Pyjamas and Slippers: A two piece pyjamas or a night gown that has front buttons to aid breast feeding.

Underwear-Medium to Large size: You can buy cotton underwear-not the fancy ones about 6-8 of them and if you are buying inexpensive ones, you can always dispose them as they can get a bit messy with leaks. There are also disposable underwears available for this purpose, which come in a set of 6-8.

Sanitary pads: Pick about 8-9 for each day. Go in for normal sanitary pads and not the ultra-thins or tampons. Some hospitals provide maternal sanitary pads meant for the occasion, which are also available in medical shops.

Toiletries: You can take soap, shampoo, toothpaste, toothbrush, comb, a hair band to keep hair off the face and a few bands to tie the hair. Avoid using deodorant during your stay in the hospital and in the initial days of breast-feeding. Even babies like mom’s body smell than anything else.

Maternity bras: It is a natural phenomenon that you will be leaking milk, so buy appropriate maternity bras – about 6 of them for your three-to-four days stay at the hospital, and later. Take a stole/shawl or a nursing wrap if it would make you feel comfortable during breast feeding.

Clothes to go back home: Most luxury hospitals offer gowns for the new mother and a wrap for the baby. You can however opt to take your own set of clothes including three sets of front –button tops and pyjamas and a comfortable outfit to go home with the baby. You can even carry along an outfit in your packing bag for professional photo-session that are done in many high-end hospitals.

For the Baby

Nappies: It is better to have a rather large reserve of nappies when it comes to your newborn essentials. Keep a few cloth nappies as keeping the baby constantly in disposable nappies can cause irritation to the baby’s skin.

Baby wipes and powder: It is best to use cotton wool and water for a newborn due to its sensitive skin, but a few wipes can be handy as well.

Jumpsuits: Grow suits or jumpsuits of newborn size are a good option as they cover the entire body of the baby. An additional wrap or two can be taken with the set of clothes to make the baby feel comfortable when held by mom or others.

Bottles: If you plan to bottle–feed as a top-up or due to a medical condition where you cannot breast-feed, carry sterilized bottles–around four of them. However do note, that breast milk is ‘the’ healthy food you can give to your baby for the next six months

Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma lives in Bangalore and loves reading and writing on society and changing lifestyles.
This article was posted on Citizen Matters website on August 2nd 2013

The answers might be out there

Pregnancy and Parenting, Published Articles, Reshma's Blog, The Hindu

Trends Bringing up children is not rocket science. However given the all-knowing Internet is just a click away, parents are checking online resources for answers and reassurance, writes RESHMA KRISHNAMURTHY SHARMA

Keep it simpleWith some help from family, friends and the netPhoto: Sandeep saxena

Until a few years ago, parenting was considered a natural progression of motherhood. Parents, didn’t have to look too far for advice about how to bring up their children—as it was readily available from parents and friendly-neighbourhood aunties.

However, now with nuclear families becoming the norm rather than exception, parents are increasingly relying on advice online or from books. Mums-to-be go on an overdrive to gather information as soon as they get to know they are pregnant. This continues into the parenting phase as well where it is shared with fathers too.

Parents have a host of options from books, videos and websites provide information for the initial years of parenting, and information-hungry parents are waiting to devour it. If these are not enough, there are parenting workshops conducted by pre-schools and maternity hospitals. So has parenting become tougher over the years?

Says Swati Popat Vats, a parenting expert and head of a pre-school chain, “Parenting has changed in the last few years. There are many reasons including nuclear families, working moms and single-parent families.People require support in their day-to-day parenting decisions. Thanks to the internet, parents are on facebook, google and other websites. Conflicting advice leads to a lot of confusion. Parents need to be guided on guilt-free and instinctive parenting. Not to forget, earlier a dedicated member of the family was focused on bringing up the children whereas today parenting is a part of the many duties that parents perform.”

Grandparents are not completely ruled out of the proceedings. Says Lavanya Raghuram, a HR professional and mother of an eight-year-old Puja, “There are enough issues to be tackled right from toddler age to pre-teens and way beyond regarding children. Once in a while, I go to a websites or internet forums and talk to friends or colleagues who have children of a similar age. My parents are just a phone call away and I take their advice occasionally as they do not belong to this generation.”

Rashmi Patel, an entrepreneur and a mom of a two-year-old begs to differ. “I think parenting is a personal discovery for every individual. Though I have read a lot of pregnancy books, I go by instinct on handling every-day issues with my child.”

Swati says: “Materialistic parenting is a growing trend across the country in urban sectors. Many parents think they can substitute their time and attention with toys and gifts. Also incorrect lifestyle habits, too much focus on keeping the child busy and lack of physical exercise is adding to the burden. Earlier children had it much easier as they had references of uniform standards and practices. Today, with parents raising children in multiple value-based environments; it is making things difficult for children to conform to a particular lifestyle or habit.”

Psychiatrist Dr. Yesheswini Kamaraju says, “Children today are exposed to a great deal more of technology. Parents need to be in tune with this as well. Unlike the earlier authoritative style, today the focus is on communication, regardless of the age of the child. Parents, can go by inherent parenting rules unless an issue comes up where a reference is required and there are enough available.” Parenting has undergone tremendous changes. But change is about progress and the sooner one adapts to the changes, the better it is for all concerned.

The article has appeared in the Hindu Metro Plus in Bangalore edition on June 11th 2013 . Link to the original write-up is here- http://www.thehindu.com/features/metroplus/the-answers-might-be-out-there/article4800277.ece

 

 

Mommy glam or commercial sham?

Deccan Herald, General Thoughts, Pregnancy and Parenting, Published Articles

While the one-day celebration might be a special thing to few moms, there are few others who maintain that it’s a commercial gimmick.

The Mother’s Day concept will be turning 99 years old since American President Woodrow Wilson signed the petition to bring it into effect in 1914. In modern times, the day is engulfed with a clout of new age consumerism where the day is just incomplete without greeting cards, chocolates, flowers or even spa indulgences for moms. Ironically, the inventor of Mother’s Day, Anna Jarvis, was in favour of honoring mothers and not buying things for mothers. It is said that she regretted having this day as it went beyond her capacity and became a commercialized observance.

Media buzz has made Mother’s Day a chosen date for gifting as a thanks-giving activity. Adding to the popularity are enterprises that are cashing in on the hype – florists, restaurants, jewellery stores, activity centres, maternity hospitals, online shopping sites, baby stores, health products manufacturers and surely a few more will contribute to the glitz with their activities for moms and even would-be-moms.

But did our moms know of such special days when we were young? No, this is the celebration of new age moms in urban India. Though, of course, my mom and her peers in the last few years, have asked me how I felt on Mother’s Day and I wasn’t sure whether it made me happy or ignore it altogether as just another trend.

Says Nandini Hirianniah, an entrepreneur and mom to four year old Sanaa, “I think the mother-child relationship is beyond any of these marketing exercises. My daughter’s smile is an acknowledgement of my being. Her shaping up to be a confident individual who can make the right decisions for herself is in itself my celebration of being a mom. She is unaware of the concept of Mother’s Day right now. But when I see the love and gratitude in her eyes every day, that becomes the most fulfilling aspect of my being a mother”.

Echoing a similar view, says Roopa Rangaswamy, mom to ten year old Khushi, “The challenges faced by today’s kids are varied and far too many. Mothers have to be equipped to play the role of a friend, teacher, mentor and many roles rolled into one. In my opinion, Mother’s day is a big hype as you do not need a specific day to communicate your love to your mother. Relationships are built, managed and communicated on a daily basis and I think such single-day celebrations are a sham.”

But not all moms are against the celebration. Says Leela Gaur Sharma, a financial analyst and mom to six-month-old Tanya, “I am glad we celebrate it, even though it has traditionally not been part of Indian culture. I think people in India are less expressive. So, if this day is made to celebrate one of nature’s most beautiful  relationships, why not? It was on one such Mother’s Day that my brother got a perfume for my mother and it made her feel really special. It gives people opportunities to express their love. Regarding the hype over a specific day, why complain when just about everything is marketed today? And as it is, consumers, including growing kids these days, are mature enough to understand what is suitable for them.”

Dr Bhavana B, Corporate Relations Manager, a mother to growing sons Vivikth and Vishnu, feels glad about the day being marked as a recognition for mothers’ unconditional love. Says she, “The word ‘mother’ is often the first one to be used by most of us during happiness, sorrows, or any other emotions involved. Being a mom to today’s Gen Y kids has taken a new meaning unlike the earlier times. Today, one needs to stay updated and match the expectations of children. If we have a dedicated Mother’s Day celebration, it definitely adds value and cheer.”

A visibly hands-on full-time mother Geeta Chopra, a mom to three daughters, Sonali, Sejal, and Diti, who are triplets and are a little over two and half years, says, “Nature blessed me with three kids and that too together! I really understand how challenging, every minute, it is to be a mom. Occasions such as Mother’s day are good as it makes me feel very special. We have our own celebration at home, with the kids and my husband, and it definitely relaxes me”.

A lot of internet sites are brimming with content on what gifts to choose for moms or ideas that can make your mother feel happy.

Growing in parallel are opinions from moms and bloggers who reckon pre-packaged days are a passé. Many believe that if you want to express your love to your mother or wife, there is no need to hold on until Valentine’s Day or Mother’s Day. Rather, gifting and celebrating on personal occasions like your wedding anniversary or your mom’s birthday would be more natural.

It’s also that due to the hype reflected through mass media like television and nespapers or magazines, a lot of teenagers get fascinated with the Mother’s Day concept.
Defending her stance, says a thirteen old Harshita, “I love Mother’s Day. Mothers around the world are always highly stressed and do so much for their families. Occasions like these make them feel special. So why not take it in the positive spirit? But yes, there’s no need to be upset if your son or daughter didn’t wish you on Mother’s Day, it’s no big deal.”

In all the glitz and celebrations that will be held tomorrow across the city, perhaps you can think of celebrating the day in a unique manner that can make you and your mom feel happy. No matter what age you are, many of you are lucky to have a soul who understands, accepts, and lends a shoulder whenever you want.

So in case you want to make your mom feel good, here are some gestures she would appreciate:

* Write a personal letter to your Mom. (Anna Jarvis – the founder of modern day Mother’s Day wanted children to write letters and not really buy cards or flowers)

* Spend the Sunday with your Mom, helping her with the chores. This would be a great gift as her daily routine is otherwise taken for granted.

* Sit down to talk to her to know what makes her happy and try to bring one change in yourself that can make her feel good about you.

http://www.deccanherald.com/content/331587/mommy-glam-commercial-sham.html

The article was published in Living supplement of Deccan Herald on May 11th 2013 (on the eve of Mother’s day).

On the food path

General Thoughts, Published Articles, The Hindu

Trends Food has become an all encompassing presence, television and otherwise. Kids to parents, everyone’s plunged into cooking, finds RESHMA KRISHNAMURTHY SHARMA

Eyes on the jobStarting youngPhoto: R. Ravindran

From being a hobby to a profession and even an obsession for some, cooking is finding many takers in recent times for varied reasons. Adding to the popularity is the rise in cookery shows on television; hosted by people who make the experience look super cool with ample seasonings of humour, exotic locales and ingredients.

Some of these shows are hosted by well-known personalities and noted celebrities to add the glamour quotient. Even game contests have entered this domain where reality shows like theMasterChef series are making the young and the adults experiment with food.

Food has always been an important part of our lives and while there are enough dine-out opportunities or ready to eat fast-food joints, those who really love food feel nothing is more satisfying than trying a dish in one’s kitchen.

Says Manish Gaur, Director of Training at Institute of Baking & Cake Art: “Kitchens have turned out to be innovative spaces that have received a huge makeover in the last few years. Undoubtedly, shows like MasterChef have encouraged aspiring youngsters and homemakers to love and experiment with food. We have a short term course of three days that is very popular with the young between eight and 15 years of age, and this year we do have a lot of queries for it.”

Varun Satish, all of nine years says, “Cooking is a very satisfying feeling. I am in a happy state when I create a good dish.” An avid watcher of all the cookery shows on TV, he says he likes trying out Chinese and Italian cuisines. His dad, Satish, says though Varun aspires to be an engineer, given the time he spends in kitchens he might turn to be an excellent chef.

With traditional stereotype gender roles getting equalised in urban societies, cooking is no longer only a woman’s domain. It is becoming a life skill that is encouraged by parents. Summer camps offer cooking classes as well as cooking without fire. These camps have parents cooking with their children with mom and child days being very popular.

Globalisation, exposure to recipes on internet and TV, availability of a range of cook books and travel has made everyone interested in a variety of cuisines. With the kitchens turning into the centre of activity, the space is no longer dark and dinghy. Rather with modern, time saving gadgets and a bright, airy feel, the kitchen has been reinstated as the heart of the home. Shruti Singhal who is planning to start an exclusive cooking club for the young sums up saying, “Cooking creates a happy state of mind. Awareness on this subject through various mediums, has got young people interested in it. In a health conscious society, good food and a variety of tastes is appealing. If it is in one’s hands to create something good and wholesome, it is a win-win situation.”

http://www.thehindu.com/todays-paper/tp-features/tp-metroplus/on-the-food-path/article4596685.ece

The article was published in the Hindu Metro Plus on April 9th 2013.

On the airwaves for change

Published Articles, Reshma's Blog, The Hindu

Radio ga gaShamantha and her team of RJs

People Sarathi Jhalak, a community radio station in rural Bangalore, is seeing a steady increase in its listener base. Shamantha D.S., who started the station, walks RESHMA KRISHNAMURTHY SHARMA through the success story

It’s hard not to get affected by Shamantha D.S’s exuberance. Sarathi Jhalak, a community radio station in rural Bangalore at Anugondanahalli, in Hoskote taluk has seen a steady increase in its listener’s base since last August, thanks to Shamantha’s efforts.

Unlike the skyscraper views of most radio stations in Bangalore or the hi-tech ambience, Sarathi Jhalak which is aired on 90.4 FM has a view of tomato fields and cabbage gardens and a bare look room with basic equipment.

Simplicity seems to be the main reason for the station’s rising popularity. The listeners from the villages nearby want content that talks their language and highlight issues that affect them. Doing the balancing act between being a regular station and a community radio station has been a challenge for Sarathi Jhalak.

What was started as an all-woman station is now also employing men as RJs, for program supervision and content programming. Ranging from programs that target the student community and women,, the RJ’s of 90.4 FM say their chosen part-time career has been an eye-opener for everyone.

“On an average we are on air for about 16 hours a day from Monday to Saturday with Kannada anchoring and songs of folk to classical music and film songs from Kannada, Telugu and Hindi films to cater to this region’s audience tastes,” says Shamantha.

The dynamic young woman has been into radio journalism as well as other streams of media careers says starting the radio station through her NGO, Sarathi has been the high point of her career. Shamantha is excited and believes the community radio station has the potential to make a difference in the lives of people in Anugondanahalli and nearby areas. The RJs of Sarathi Jhalak come from very varied backgrounds. They all hail from Anugondanahalli and continue with their day jobs of beautician, driver and counsellor at a hospital. They allocate a few hours to radio out of passion, admitting they had not expected such a response that has turned them into mini celebrities!

Shamantha admits it has not been easy. “I am thankful to government agencies such as BSNL, BESCOM and BECIL who supported us with technical know-how for a radio station including telephone lines and assisted us with relevant technical knowledge to run the station smoothly.

Of course we were all very anxious for the first month as we didn’t know whether we had plunged into the right thing. Today we are happy we are part of a radio station that many villages have made their companion.” She adds that her radio experience at AIR and guidance by key people from AIR has helped her set up the station.

When asked about taking a backseat after being in the forefront as a RJ, and filmmaker, Shamantha demands, “Isn’t seeing a team running a station a greater responsibility? I do go on air sometimes but I feel happy when I see my RJs who were novices and have now turned out to be polished professionals. The listeners’ response in the form of text messages (250 in two hours) and hordes of letters is proof of the adulation we receive.”

After a pause she adds, “Once a boy was lost and we were able to reunite him with his parents within a few hours thanks to the alertness of another listener and our phone lines being open. It is incidents like this or our program Manasina Mathu where youngsters talk of their worries and concerns on air and that make us realize that it’s not only urbanites who are stressed out.”

Shamantha reserves her visits to the station to once or twice a week and has handed the day-to-day management to the RJs and program director. Shamantha who is continuing to dabble in filmmaking and developmental journalism sums up saying, “Sarathi Jhalak has offered insights on the needs of villagers. For instance the need for old age homes in villages, as most youngsters are in cities on work. Issues like this can be addressed and their needs can be taken care of by organisations. We have a long way to go to extendour reach. We are now able to reach only nearby villages and we are hoping our radio reaches more listeners. Finally, along with regular entertainment programs, if we are able to address the needs of the rural folk, that would be Sarathi’s biggest achievement.”

http://www.thehindu.com/todays-paper/tp-features/tp-metroplus/on-the-airwaves-for-change/article4668439.ece

The article was published in the Hindu Metro Plus on April 30th 2013.

Once birthed, twice the joy!

Deccan Herald, Pregnancy and Parenting, Published Articles, Reshma's Blog
Reshma K Sharma, April 20, 2013:

TWIN BUNDLE

Anxiety soars high when a would-be mom is in for a double bundle of joy, writes Reshma K Sharma.

Preparing for motherhood brings a bag of mixed emotions for most would-be-moms. However the anxiousness, jitters and concerns are perhaps double-fold right through the pregnancy if a woman is expecting more than one baby. While it is a pleasurable phase for others to see twins dressed in identical clothes or just being together, it could be a daunting task for new mothers, especially for first-timers. Experts opine that the key to manage this phase is effective planning.

To avoid situations where you would get depressed about too many things falling on your lap make sure to get life simpler with good planning. This could be like getting enough clothes for both babies in advance, just in case you’re unable to get them washed everyday. Or it could be getting people to engage one baby at different schedules while you are busy with the other one. In other words, be aware of twin baby necessities right from their clothing requirements to crib to the daily schedule planned in advance if possible. Talk to others, who have had twins; it’ll help you go a long way. But most importantly, be flexible in your approach for last-minute changes in your life.

According to Dr Geetha Belliappa, Consultant Gynecologist & Obstetrician, “A twin pregnancy is as much a double blessing as it is a tough task. Twin pregnancies require more monitoring than single pregnancies. Twins can bring double the joy, but parenting twins means double the work – at least initially. The key is to be prepared. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and needless to say, financially.”

Dr Geeta shares a few insights that would-be-parents of twins or multiples may find useful:

* Breastfeed both babies simultaneously. It really is possible to feed both babies at the same time with one twin on each breast. But it takes great coordination and patience. But it saves you some time for yourself.
* Put the twins in the same crib initially. But shift them to separate cribs once they begin to roll. Otherwise, they may bump into one another and wake each other up. While one crib is fine, two car seats and a double-stroller are absolute musts for newborn twins.
* Twins may be similar, but they are also different. Encourage the differences between twins and never compare twins to one another. Separating the twins in the later stage is highly recommended. It is in their best interest to be separated and get their own group of friends.
* Parenting twins gets easier with time. Young twins are easier to raise as they have each other to play with, and sleep better than singletons once they reach the age of two.

Going by the practical experience of raising twin babies, now aged two, says Shilpa Nayak, a software engineer, “It is very essential to plan on who would be the actual hands-on mother or caretaker in the case of twins and be prepared for the journey. I had my mother all along and thankfully, because of her, I was able to get back to work. I felt that it was only their first year that was the toughest to handle. Especially when they learn to sit, crawl and move around, because you are constantly worried they might harm themselves. But once this phase passes, it’s a lot easier.

Another mother of 10-year-old twin boys, Jyoshna V, confirming this opinion, says “It is the initial one year that new mothers or parents have to cope up with. Challenges of sleep schedules, breast feeding, and potty training are hectic. After that I have felt that it is good as the twins give company to each other. It is indeed a fun experience to watch twins grow up.”

Twins, as most parents and experts feel, are good playmates and companions in the growing years. Many parents also feel it is a matter of time before you can sit back and feel that your job of raising two children is easier than going through parenting phase repeatedly. All it needs is a bit of sound planning and support from your loved ones, and you would be well on your way to bounce back in life.

This article was published in Deccan Herald in the Living supplement on April 20th 2013.

A pocketful of sunshine

Deccan Herald, General Thoughts, Published Articles, Reshma's Blog

It may seem harsh, but you are the only one who can help yourself through darkness, writes Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma.

 

Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma, March 2, 2013:

CROSSROADS

Life appears to be near perfect, if not absolutely perfect. Then, unexpectedly, monsters come your way, knocking on your doors. You encounter a major illness. Or a huge financial loss with which you have lost everything in one stroke – money, status, and relationships.
Or a situation where you lost the love of your life to death or divorce. Or an infertility diagnosis that leaves you feeling barren. A personal tragedy in life, needless to say, drains you emotionally.
The catastrophic personal loss becomes a phase that most of us struggle to come out of. Life just seems to be at crossroads that make you choose between giving up and surrendering to the situation, and starting your second innings in life. Surviving the situation is probably the trickiest part of these instances.
But the biggest challenge lay in finding happiness, or atleast comfort, after having battled out tragedies.

Says Dr Keerti Tewari, a breast cancer survivor in her thirties, post her treatment at HCG hospitals six years ago, “For a person who has studied medicine, I knew that there was something wrong with me, and finally decided to have a check-up. On conducting a random self-examination, the results confirmed that I had breast cancer. The very name of the disease or imagining its implications put me off completely. But my husband let me cry for about two days and then took control of the situation. We started going to several hospitals for consultations and zeroed in on HCG. But no matter what form of support system you may have, ultimately it is only you who has to stand up for yourself and battle out the negativity from your life.”
“The pain I underwent was unimaginable, both at an emotional level and at a physical level. I was balding, putting on weight due to the treatment, and even losing my eyelashes! It was not an easy path when I chose to battle with cancer and decided to have my life back.”
Life, at times, demands that you go harsh on yourself to make things better for yourself. If you can’t hold onto yourself, no one can. Sharanya Gupta (name changed), who recently had her divorce come through, says, “Everything seemed good when I married the man of my choice. I even had my family to support me. I took a sabbatical from work as I wanted to live this dream of being a happy wife. Now it seems so illusionary and a dream that was only mine and not my husband’s! I was trying to work on my marriage which was turning sour and soon got to know that my husband was cheating on me! The feelings of anger, frustration, and shock hit me hard. I had wasted my time on a relationship that was never meant to be a good one. Finally, it dawned on me that brooding over it would fetch me nothing and that I had to walk out of the marriage. I got back my job and let myself be consumed by work to forget everything else. I did everything that I wanted to, like going to watch good plays, travel a little bit, spending time with myself, though I had good friends and family with me. Today, living as a single woman has become a conscious and deliberate decision. If nothing else, I’m  atleast at peace with myself.”
If you can take control of your life and lead yourself towards a better you, nothing can stop you from being at peace.

Anish R, a young businessman who faced a huge financial crisis says, “Financial loss is something that just doesn’t take away only monetary assets. It can take away a person’s social status, lead to severe emotional breakdown and even break relationships. I had suffered so terribly in my business venture that there was a stage when I was close to losing my home. I was even worried about the next meal. The pressure was immense and I had to start all over again.

It does take a lot of courage to keep a straight face in front of people, especially when you do not want their sympathy, and just want to thrive on ideas and opportunities to stand tall once again. Today, my business is doing fine and I have built up another home. Being emotionally strong is a key aspect in getting over financial crisis.

Negative thoughts of anger, frustration and depression, or even suicidal tendencies, are going to hit you, but you must give up!”
You have only yourself to prove to and you must never let yourself down. Ali Khwaja, a counsellor, says, “Trauma or a breakdown can be the result of any major happening where the person is unable to cope, and it affects him/her emotionally. Individuals need to look for self-help mechanisms, where they build on inner strength to cope with such situations, and then talk about it to family or friends. Build a support system around you to help you sail through this phase and also, if required, talk to a professional counsellor to fight the battle.”
As a word of caution, he further adds, “Parents need to teach children to understand that failure is part of life and accept that it’s absolutely fine not to be an achiever in everything. That life has its ups and downs for every individual. People need to learn to survive the minor battles right from the beginning in case a situation arises where you need to be strong and this can happen only if you are emotionally secure.”
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross might have given the world five stages of grief to any form of catastrophic personal loss model in her book ‘On Death and Dying’. The stages – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are mechanisms of adjusting with grief and perhaps those who are survivors of personal loss or trauma may have undergone these stages or much more.
But a strong message from survivors is that it is only ‘you’ who can help yourself to overcome a burdening experience. Remember difficult times will definitely pass. It’s only a phase. Let go and live life as a fighter, and maybe the best is yet to come, so live on…

http://www.deccanherald.com/content/315821/a-pocketful-sunshine.html– The article was published in the Living Supplement of Deccan Herald on March 2nd 2013.

Celeb soup for the bored soul

Published Articles, Reshma's Blog, The Hindu

Why are we so obsessed with celebrity news? The personal life of models, actors or cricketers may be a stress reliever or a conversation starter, says Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma

Whether we’re flipping channels, turning to page three, or surfing the Internet, we perk up as soon as a celebrity is talked about in the media. It could be their birthday, an outburst of anger, photographs of their parties, or a date they had in a restaurant. Anything and everything to do with celebrities, especially if there are photographs or videos available, is instantly devoured by a large audience.

Why are we so intrigued when we hear such news or gossip? Says Gautami K, a marketing professional, “I think it’s the boredom or monotony of life that gets to us. Every once in a while, I do browse major news sites or entertainment sites for celebrity news. Likewise, if I am at home I do want to be updated on the latest gossip on Indian celebrities or the Hollywood ones. This is one of the ways I can relax.”

Many people find reading of a cricketer’s interests or an actor’s lifestyle a way to transport themselves to a world where they seldom think of their own worries.

Says Manjula Shetty, proprietor of a leading beauty salon, “Women find it very relaxing when they are reading something on lifestyle or the film magazines. You generally find a lot of these magazines at beauty salons because women come here to be pampered and relax.”

Of late, almost everyone in show business seems to post intricate details of their life, whether to share good news or to defend their actions, statement or opinion. In the age of blogging and twitter, we hear what kind of dress they wore or what their opinion is on some issue, or what their new baby is like. Everything to do with glamorous celebrities seems to be welcome. These celebrities also know that it’s good to be talked about even if they are not doing all that well in their chosen profession. After all, being a celebrity is all about being clicked and followed in the virtual world, too. Is it only women who find such gossip interesting? No, says Raghu Rao, a professional working in an advertising agency. “Men too like to know of their favourite sports personalities’ personal life, photographs or comments by their favourite actors to feel closer with their icons.”

There have been instances when those in the public eye are abusive, misbehave, or make controversial comments, before apologizing just as publicly. There are wannabes who post frivolous pictures of themselves that are anything but appealing. In a country that is heavily dependent on film celebrities, cricketers and the like for major entertainment news, people like to know personal details. No one complains until there is an overdose of news about a single celebrity. Celebrity gossip offers stress-free therapy, brings friends together over lunch and lightens up the office environment. It also gives people reasons to laugh or feel good that they were not the person caught in an awkward photograph, opening a window for negative emotions to be thrown out. The next time you find an introvert colleague surfing through an actor’s childhood pictures splashed on the web, perhaps you could join in. It may just start a conversation.

The article was published on February 19th 2013 in the Hindu Metro Plus- http://www.thehindu.com/features/metroplus/society/celeb-soup-for-the-bored-soul/article4428222.ece

When the stork comes a-calling in style

Deccan Herald, General Thoughts, Published Articles

Being pregnant has never been more fashionable than now, writes Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma

Thanks to Bollywood Moms, the average woman is now confident about her pregnancy, struts about in branded maternity clothing, and participates in fashion hunts. She may take a break to enjoy her pregnancy or she may continue to work. Either way, she wants to prove to herself and others around her that she is “pregnant, confident, and happy. Period.”

The Brits are celebrating the royal pregnancy in style with the much hyped Kate Middleton’s expected arrival in July 2013. Back home, we might not have a royal baby on the news as the next big arrival, but there are enough women celebrities who are married, and the next big announcement after their wedding seems to be of their pregnancy.

Yes, pregnancy has become a style statement! It has become a reason to be fashionable, to be in the limelight, and get fans to hear about the much-awaited news. Today anchors, models, and actresses take it in their stride to talk about pregnancy, as it adds a new dimension to their personality.

Who could forget Bollywood actress Aishwarya’s pregnancy announcement with her losing a film project due to pregnancy!

Her journey as a mother with baby Aaradhya, and of course, post–pregnancy weight were quite the eye-grabbers in all media. Celebrities like Shilpa Shetty, Mandira Bedi, Lara Dutta, and Celina Jaitley have all been in the limelight for pregnancy-related announcements promoting yoga CDs, baby pictures and more. In what has been seen as a global trend, women are becoming stronger in their decisions and like marriage, pregnancy too has become a natural phase of life that is accepted. It doesn’t bother women anymore as they believe with talent, work will come again, even if it is in the show business.

A decade ago, in India, this would seem inappropriate, especially if one were in the glam industry of films, small screen, and entertainment channels. A decade ago, no such hype existed. Women, especially under the arc lights, were reluctant to talk about pregnancy. Moms-to-be wanted to hide the growing bulge, as pregnancy was considered as an announcement that could hamper career prospects.

Today, however, pregnancy fashion has become a huge business opportunity to be cashed. The mom-to-be is bombarded with a host of products like pregnancy clothing, accessories, necessities like pregnancy pillows, stretch mark creams, specified pregnancy slip-on shoes to name a few. In all the gamut of assertion and the need for women to be recognized for their talent, no matter what event occurs in life, the phase has also become the perfect opportunity for marketeers to utilize the given opportunity with products and services to suit the category. This, they say, is all about “living in style” and “convenience”. The would-be-mother is made to feel special and privileged. Several events encourage the lady to be in the limelight with fashion shows or pregnancy calendars. Pregnancy photographers are a new breed of camera-persons on the block, who make you believe that pregnancy is a time to be cherished and stored as a wonderful memory.

In the last decade, a drastic change from multi-speciality hospitals to dedicated maternity hospitals has spruced up for the changing consumer. Today, many pregnant women want to go to a single speciality hospital when it comes to maternity care. No wonder these single speciality hospitals of pregnancy and paediatric care have enough activities to make the momma-to-be believe that this is once-in-a-life-time opportunity and that it needs to be special. With just one or two pregnancies being the norm in urban households today, it is not surprising that most moms-to-be are embracing activities from dedicated mother and child stores, hospitals, and websites that talk of pregnancy as a “never-before and never-after (perhaps)” experience. Many women have even become regular bloggers who write articles and stories detailing every month of their pregnancy and post pregnancy experiences!

Since ages, pregnant women have always been advised to exercise for an easy delivery. Now though, there is a fun alternative – dance therapy! Even classical dance forms are being appropriated and choreographed to suit pregnant women. This trend is fast catching up and even has the approval of many gynaecologists. It is probably not long before we see a pregnancy-speciality restaurant or a special pregnancy makeover by a noted salon to make the lady’s day.

Here are some of the most trendy ways to enjoy pregnancy:

– Get a makeover done with a noted beauty salon
– Get a specialized photographer to shoot you a pregnancy portfolio
– Get friends to arrange for a pregnancy get-together in someone’s home. It would be good to share an afternoon lunch with other pregnant women to talk about your current phase, especially with people who are in the same zone. Try and arrange for a movie screening on DVD with fresh juices and popcorn to munch on.
– Write a few letters to the unborn baby. Actual handwritten letters. Maybe on what you did that day. These can be stored in a well-decorated box and shared with your little one, once she is able to understand and of course, read well.
– Look-up a restaurant that can arrange for a lovely candle-light dinner in a beautiful ambience that will make you feel good.

Basking in motherly glory is certainly an in-thing now, and most pregnant women are lapping it up. And why not? Afterall, pregnancy is indeed a once-in-a-lifetime experience, a miracle the woman’s body was designed for!

 

The article was published on February 2nd 2012 in the Living Supplement of Deccan Herald.

http://www.deccanherald.com/content/309197/when-stork-comes-calling-style.html