International Women’s Day is round the corner, in fact this Saturday on March 8th 2014. Obviously there are going to be several publicized events and talk shows on the telly and in cities.

While the celebration perhaps is to appreciate womanhood, I have realized that freedom to do what you want in life and be what you want to be, means a lot for a woman like me. And that can be any day.

Since the last few months I have been noticing in Bangalore, that there are many women who are attending theatre performances, going to movie halls and having a good time. What’s the big deal, you ask? It’s just that they are perfectly fine going to these shows all alone. No company, no problem. Being alone is fun too when you have to watch the show at peace.

When there is a time constraint and multiple movies or theatre performances being showcased for a limited time, women have now resorted to going to watch performances all alone as one cannot wait for the right company every time. (read husband/boyfriend/friend).

Thankfully unlike a few years ago, the sympathy stares and gossip puddles too have come down. Earlier when a woman went to a theatre or at a restaurant all alone, there would be endless speculations on why she was there all alone (all from strangers). Had written too a piece on this years ago when the stares were deeply ingrained. Literally I could feel every stare and assumption made on me if I ever went to a food joint alone.

Nevertheless happy to say that women are getting used to the unwanted stares or gossip or perhaps the speculations of a woman going to watch a movie or theatrical show or have a meal is seen as a normal thing.

Happy Women’s Day, everyday. This year the theme apart from the UN theme is Inspiring change.  Let me hope women can actually inspire others to change for good and for a better world in a male dominating society.

Bangalore is the capital city of the Karnataka state in South India. Kannada is the local language spoken in the city though in the current times, most are well versed in English, and Hindi. There are a huge number who speak and converse in Tamil, Telugu and other Indian languages even though it is not their native language.

The city has established itself undoubtedly as a cosmopolitan city that offers the glimpse of the country and its ability to welcome and live with members from any part of the globe.

The following are the ten things that I can put down as a first-hand guide for a visitor who is new to the city.

1. Bangalore is also known as Bengaluru. Make sure you eat a masala dosa at a darshini in the city. Darshinis are the hotspots of breakfast eat outs that almost run through the day. The ones that have people swarming at the eatery will surely have a good masala dosa. Popular ones are Vidyarthi Bhavan, Adigas, MTR and Maiyyas.

2. Bangalore has a unique climate. The season though is divided between summer, winter, spring and rains; it is not uncommon to find cool and pleasant weather in the mornings and scorching heat in the afternoons. It is again not a rare sight to find a heavy rainy shower in some streets during the rainy season of July-September to have some streets which may be just few yards away a bare dry weather.

When in Bangalore, make sure you visit a good saree store to buy a saree for a loved one. A reasonable good saree ranges between Rs, 1000/- to 10,000. The range can go higher too if you want to buy.  A few popular stores are Vijaylakshmi, Prasiddhi, Deepam, Nalli, Soch. Alternatively you can buy a khadi kurta at Desi, Fab India stores and Grameen Angadi at JP Nagar.

3. Bangalore has quite a few scenic temples. If you can make time then do visit Bull Temple at Basavanagudi, Rajrajeshwari temple (for its intricate work), Iskon temple (a temple that has a modern touch to it) and Venkateshwara temple at Banashankari.

4. It is recommended that you dress conservatively when visiting a temple. You can wear trousers and tops but shorts and short skirts are not welcomed at the holy shrines in Bangalore. And yes dressing full covered clothes would save you unwanted stares.

4. Bangalore is home to a few gardens. For a stroll you can visit Lalbagh. Wouldn’t really recommend CubbonPark as it does not appear safe for a visitor and is a scattered space.

5. When it comes to eateries and cuisines then Bangalore has welcomed various cuisines to its city. If you are fine trying a rice dish, then try out a Puliogere or a Bisibelebath. Also if possible take time to have an authentic and grand Karnataka lunch. Good options are at MTR, Pai comforts at JP nagar to name a few. And last but not the least while you may otherwise enjoy cappuccinos and black teas; try a filter coffee –light at any darshini

6. Bangalore has quite a few malls in various parts of the city. The ones that are worth a visit are Phoenix Market city at Whitefield, Mantri Mall at Malleshwaram and Forum at Koramangala.

7. The city has a great patronage for Indian art forms. Almost every single week there are Bharatnatyam performances to classical Indian music shows. Some are conducted at temples, others at specific venues for performing arts. Look in an English daily supplement to find out on the performances in the city. You can attend a few for free too.

8. Bangalore though has a midnight deadline in restaurants and pubs are relatively safe for visitors. However be a little careful about auto rickshaw drivers. It is advisable that you book a cab or have a friend who knows the local language/any Indian language when travelling in the city. Yet most auto rickshaw drivers will understand English. You can also take a pre-booked auto if you inevitably have to travel alone in an auto. You will be cheated on a lesser range! Refrain if possible to travel late evenings if you are a woman.

Bangalore is known for being home to good pubs. A few good ones are Hard Rock café, a few at UB city and around MG road.

9. Bangalore due to its mixed population is home to various inter-state and international cuisines. So if you are missing your home food then you can be assured of finding one restaurant at least that will offer Bengali, Gujrathi, Punjabi, Rajasthani, Andhra, Kerala, Mexican, Thai, Chinese and the Pizza chains. Oh yes there are scores of KFC chains, Subways and McDonalds in the city.

10. Bangalore has a vibrant theatre scene. So right from English plays to French and German and Kannada performances, the city has numerous shows every single day. You will have to plan a bit in advance if you want to attend a theatre perofmance. Good plays are regularly staged at Jagriti at Whitefield, Rangashankara at JP Nagar and Chowdiah Memorial hall near Sankey tank.

Hope you have a good time in Bangalore. Do remember that is there much more to explore in Bangalore but hoping this would be of use to people who want to get a taste of the city when they are here for a brief visit.

Blame it on hype and the mood set in by marketers. Since the last decade and gradually increasing, Valentine’s Day has become such an important discussion topic in cities. If I am not mistaken, the subject is of great importance that needs to be discussed, planned and implemented even in smaller towns in India.

Buying a bunch of red roses tomorrow is going to cost huge. But there are many teenagers and just married couples who want to indulge in this fun celebration. Well who am I to generalize. Maybe there are lot of them over 30 too who feel Valentine’s to be celebrated with great excitement.

However like every year, this year too we may have a few fanatic organizations who try to disrupt any kind of celebrations in Bangalore and other cities in the country when it comes to Valentines’.

I was at a mall recently when I overheard a sales assistant asking her colleague, if she has already bought a gift for her beau. The young lady replied quite sternly “Shouldn’t men give women for Valentine’s day?” The one who posed the question initially said it is a good occasion even for women to woo their partners. So came the fitting reply, “ I’ll wear a red outfit that day before changing to the mall uniform. I think it’s up to my husband to gift me something good, let’s leave it at that” Guess women still want men to woo them on any occasion at least on a marketed celebrated day.

I read in the dailies a few days ago that restaurants are marketing unforgettable dinners and experience for couples even at the range of Rs.1,500 to 50,000/-. Exorbitant..oh yes but those who love to celebrate this day will have reasons to justify them.

It is not that I haven’t gushed on receiving a rose or bunch of them when in college. But today I find it nice.. but not for me. Maybe I am older, maybe I am cynical, maybe I am wary…nevertheless that’s me.

Sent this for a column in a daily. it has not yet seen the virtue of being published in a publication.

Thought, nevertheless will share it on my blog.

An evening with my child at the famed flower show at Lalbagh, Bengaluru recently offered me an insight to human psychology. This was of immense significance when I reviewed on Indian behavior broadly at public spaces. It was supposed to be just an evening where my four-year-old and me, would get to admire the flower bloom at the glass house in the spectacular garden.

As anticipated there was a huge beeline of people who had made time to view the flower spectacle; parents with tiny tots, honeymooners, school-going-students, bunch of friends, women returning from work with colleagues, senior citizens and virtually every category had their representatives.

But what caught my eye distinctly and I also happened to dwell upon it every moment, I spent in the cordoned area. Amazingly every single person from each family or friend’s group was flashing out his or her swanky mobile to capture the flower spectacle.

If not, they were busy focusing their camera lenses on their loved ones with the flower spread at the background.

There were several who had bought along fancy cameras and mobiles to capture individual flowers at close-up shots. Several parents were interested to feature their kids in front of the carved flower designs that resembled angry birds to faintly resembling vegetables like chillies and mushrooms.

It really didn’t matter if these people were amateur ones or seasoned photographers. It was also hilarious and understand people that they were trying hard to not to be in each other’ family’s photo frames even amidst the rush and continuous piling of people.

Even the khaki clad security force after blowing their whistles in a routine tune and uttering constantly, “  Mundhe hogi, jasthi hotthu ninthkobedi” (Move forward, do not stand in one place for too long) understood the sentiments of the visitors. People had paid Rs.40/- to capture the flower show, more importantly their moments of being at the show on digital gadgets than preserve it through naked eyes. They allowed each family to get one picture at least before being asked to move forward.

Perhaps we humans, specifically Indians love to capture our outdoor visits in photographs and videos. Be it any holiday destination, a picnic spot, a fancy restaurant or even an off-the-beat event like a flower show – we just cannot get enough of our digital obsession.

Bangalore or Bengaluru has unnecessarily achieved itself a name of being a laid back city. It may seem so when you see groups of the elderly chatting and sharing their experiences at parks, cafes and at cultural hubs. The city has tried to retain its park culture in recent times and the general mood at least in South Bangalore in the evenings among lanes fills the passerby with laughter of children who are having just fun.

Again, the local resident has realized he or she has welcomed people across states (since the last few decades) and countries and now it is the time to be upbeat and fast-paced lest, the city will be left with very few Kannadigas. I am not at all against non-kannadigas living in the city.

If you ask me it is in fact the openness that has made the city vibrant, fast-paced but restless. Scores of students, office-goers, the hyped IT community, everyone is here to fulfill their dreams. Never ending traffic woes, constant build of public infrastructure like flyovers and the metro train work, new plush buildings coming up at every last space left in the city is making one feel the city has a lot of work to be done.

Among these I find myself sometimes a little lost, sometimes a little over-enthusiastic and sometimes a dreamer to fulfill my little aspirations. Thankfully I also find myself an achiever too when I am able to meet some of my dreams in reality.

However the city has also made me feel over-cautious with people, places and even if I want to trust, a voice tells me to be careful. Blame it on the incidents that have shaken women, mothers and people. Rapes, child-abuse, robbery, unethical standards followed at offices, deplorable politics at work-places and  our leaders-there are far too many reasons why we have started avoiding trusting others.

Well if I sound pessimistic, it is not that but yes we are a city who are trying to match our experiences of living various countries, places and retain our own Bangalore culture. We are also a city where we love to chat, gulp enormous coffee cups at city darshinis, talk our heart out and solve our identity crisis as to who is the real Bangalorean?

I do hope Bangalore; my city fills the gaps in the coming years where every woman, every child, every teenager, every man and endowed with bagful of being content, safe and happy. Oh yes, also hope we get away from being restless as though we care constantly trying to gain something.