All posts by Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma

About Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma

Hello digital world, This is my space where I put in my thoughts freely. I have been into various professions related to writing and communication. Currently I am a blogger and attempting to be a interesting writer and storyteller for children.

Bandhini: Creating fine masterpieces

Deccan Herald, General Thoughts, Published Articles

Traditional Craft

Fabric in vibrant hues, bandhini, also known as bandhej, enjoys popularity not only on the streets of Rajasthan and Gujarat, but all over the world too.

The rich colours have a huge sense of appeal for buyers and they instantly symbolise a certain element of Indianness for the person wearing it. The origin of this fabric has an interesting history weaved into it.

The word bandhini means “to tie” and is derived from Sanskrit. While some believe that Muslim Khatri women brought this art form to Kutch, a few others in Rajasthan believe that artists from Neelgar and Chippa communities were the original practitioners of this art form.

Interestingly, this tie-and-dye art has evolved over the years and today bandhini fabric is available in various forms — sarees, lehengas, cholis, dupattas, scarves, stoles, shawls, skirts, and even bed spreads and cushion covers. No wonder, this traditional art form has found its way into the glamorous world of fashion and films too.

It is said that the process of producing bandhini cloth is one among the oldest crafts of the world. It is a skilled task where the artisan has to initiate the process of creating a bandhej fabric either with malmal cotton or georgette which is folded to a quarter of its size. The cloth is then placed on a table and desired designs are marked using a wooden block dipped in red colour known as geru in Kutch.

This process is alternatively done by placing a clear thin sheet of plastic pierced with pin holes on this fabric and then transferring the imprint of the desired pattern on to the fabric using the thin sheet. A rag dipped in geru is then washed over the sheet, leaving an imprint of the desired pattern on the cloth. The craftsperson then pulls a small area of the fabric where each hole is placed and winds the thread tightly to form a tiny knot.

Hundreds of such knots are formed to retain the original colour in that portion. The cloth is then washed to remove the imprint and dipped in yellow or other lighter colours.

Following this, the fabric is rinsed, squeezed and tied and then dipped in a darker colour. After the last step in the dyeing process, the cloth is washed and, if necessary, starched. The folds are then pulled apart in a particular way, releasing the knots and revealing their pattern.

Traditionally, only natural colours were used, but today, the colour scheme involves the usage of synthetic colours for faster results and bulk production. According to Abdul Kayam, owner of a small manufacturing unit of bandhej in Jaipur, “Synthetic colours are used to save on time. Women do the tying using their nails that are specifically grown long for this purpose or a spiked metal ring is used to lift and tie the tiny knots. Men do the dyeing as it involves a lot of labour. The entire process of tie-and-dye may take anything from two days to 45 days, depending on the design and embroidery involved.”

According to Raju Bhai Navrathan Makwana from Kutch, “The bandhini created in Gujarat varies from that of Rajasthan in terms of quality and design even though the process is the same.” In their book on world textiles, John Gillow and Bryan Sentance mention that bandhini was so popular in the 18th century that spotted scarves in English came to be called bandana.

Though bandhini is worn across India on every possible occasion, in Gujarat and Rajasthan, the fabric is associated with certain special occasions. For instance, Gujarati women wear bandhini saris known as garcholas only for weddings. However, for the artisans, bandhini is not only a source of livelihood, but a reflection of their rich culture.

This was published under Sunday Herald ( from Deccan Herald) on July 10, 2011 under Arts and Culture page.

To go to the link click here http://www.deccanherald.com/content/174900/bandhini-creating-fine-masterpieces.html


DO YOU HAVE ANY ISSUE?

General Thoughts, Reshma's Blog

 It was after many years that I had decided to continue my studies and after filling the admission form I was at the table who was getting the registrations done for a post graduation course particularly in English. As I waited for the documents to be filled, the gentleman in front of me asked “So you are working?” I said “Yes I am an independent writer.” Then came the next question “You are married?” I smiled and said yes. I was wondering if these questions had anything to do with my intention to do the course. It was the final question that made me think in general, how the so called English speaking population speak in India?

“Do you have any issue?” The question made me say to myself. I have several issues in life. But how would you really help me out if my maid has not turned up at the right time or I am stressing myself trying to multi task things. Suddenly it hit upon me he was asking if I had any child?

I reluctantly said yes, not sure if this was the answer to the question, “One”. He said “ha, you are sure you will be able to study further and work with a small child?” As I agreed in positive nod and got up from there the conversation set me thinking of specific Indian English terms which only we Indians can mange to understand. Like the usage of the word co–brother. I believe this is more often used in south India and has got the distinct ability to be referred one of the unique Indian words. It refers to one’s wife’s sister’s husband. Other words that can be categorized truly Indian are words like time pass or a word that had my boss at my first job when I was a twenty something fuming at me on her bad day at work. I even now remember her fuming and saying “Can’t you say eraser instead of rubber? That sounds so polished.” Eraser is something that will never erase from my memory.

For that matter words that have come of age are found in the books that you buy for your child or the recipes you read on blogs will make you learn that brinjal is no longer cool. It is after all called the eggplant.

As I made my way towards another office where I had some work I was called out “Aunty! the line starts here. Please come here.” I said why don’t you call me Ma’m instead of Aunty and she was in no mood to listen. With a sigh I did realize Uncle and Aunty were amongst hundreds of other words that will take a long time to be replaced by other words in this country. Until then we have to accept these words and phrases as uniquely Indian understood by Indians.

Convenience the mantra for modern day living

General Thoughts, Reshma's Blog

The single most element that has come to rule urban living is convenience. Be it in communication, travel, food, clothing and even parenting, people do certain things as it is the most convenient thing to do and makes life simple and easy. A brief research is presented here as to how modern day lifestyle is increasingly governed by convenience.

This was the idea I had thought of writing for a publication. The newspaper had even approved it but it never got published. I found this piece recently and felt like putting this atleast on my blog. Hope you have a good read.

Increasingly life in a metro seems to be governed by one single factor and it points out to ‘convenience’. Every aspect of our living has come to be engulfed by this major factor as it is perceived to makes life easy. People do not mind going heavier on the pocket to adopt a convenient lifestyle. Whether it shopping, travel, clothing, household chores or for that matter even parenting has embraced convenient living. Either it is to save time or lead relaxed life or it is believed that convenience is luxury affordable. Is it that people want to do anything to be stress free or are there more things to be done than ever before, hence convenience is the obvious answer to modern day living?

 City bred people have found ease of life in concepts like supermarkets, malls, satellite channels as each one of them promised convenience more than anything for the hectic lifestyle of urban living. If one were to understand, people believe this is something that is become next to our daily routine just as we eat drink or breathe. Be it gadgets, utility elements or routines; modern day lifestyle has made urbanites seek convenience in every form.

 Using one’s own vehicle is perceived to be better than public transport as it saves time and is handy even though it may turn to be expensive. Even the role of a homemaker has changed with companies churning out innovative appliances every day to make her life easy.

 The simple mode of communicating with each other has been taken over by fancy tools obviously as newer gadgets are convenient. Right from mobiles to Internet and palmtops traditional modes of communication like snail mails have become rarity as it is far more inconvenient in usage than modern technologies. Says Kauser Khan, Etiquette and grooming consultant, “ For me, technologies that have absolutely enhanced convenience are e-mail and cell phones. Whether it is for a professional or a personal need, even to keep track my children, these gadgets have turned to be the need of the time. They are precise and save considerable amount of time and it is easy for me to do more number of things in life.”

 It is not just gadgets that people have started feeling that it has made life simple. Services that make sure utility products are at doorstep are a way of enhancing convenience. Says Vani Mahesh, Proprietor, Easylib.com, “ Starting an online library way back in 2001 was only to cater to an audience that understands convenience using technology. It is true that something like Internet has amazingly become as part of daily life like kitchen appliances. In our case getting books delivered home using technology or as part of premium service is only because Internet is no longer expensive and highly reliable.”

 Affordability, rising incomes, improving standard of living has made people opt for services or usage of technologies that is perceived to enhance convenience. It may sound good to many but presenting slightly different viewpoint is Dr. Ali Khwaja, Career counselor, “ In the race of rushing against time and improving our standard of living I feel we are getting competitive, insecure and generally a sense of losing control over life.  Hence, any gadget or activity that promises quick relief, flexibility, convenience, is being grabbed whatever may be the cost.”

Adding further he mentions, “Yet I do understand that the younger generation considers gadgetry as essential to their basic living, because they have never lived without it.   I personally feel that the younger generation should be given an opportunity to know what it means to live without electronics and electricity, something like gadget free days to show that life can be led with much ease even without gadgets.”

 For a young mother of two kids Shruthi Tripathi, “Convenience has embraced every aspect of our life and it is no surprise motherhood can be left behind. With women getting to work faster post motherhood, this phase of life has adopted many things to make the role of mother easier right from bottles to pacifiers and prams amongst host of other utility items.”

 Obviously convenience is perceived differently by different people. Yet the rise in incomes, belief that it saves time and helps in happier living has made urbanites look for the c word in everything.

 BY RESHMA KRISHNAMURTHY SHARMA

Inevitable evils

Deccan Herald, General Thoughts, Published Articles

If rocking music can substitute for crude lyrics, we do not need poets.

I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard my close friend’s four-year-old humming loudly a song that I had detested for many days now. Yup, the one Deepika is swaying her hips to the item song in ‘Dum Maro Dum’. I casually asked Sneha the little one, if she knew what the line in the song meant? Pat came the remark “Aunty it is potty pe bethe nanga’, don’t you know what it means?

Purvi her mom laughed loudly as she gave me a hug to calm my stunned expression and said, “C’mon it is this generation song what is there to feel so bad. The question left me wondering if the lyricist wrote the song actually in the studio or elsewhere. Wherever he wrote I am sure people like me would never appreciate language to be diluted so much that it causes me to be ashamed to spell it out.

It is not the first time that vulgar lyrics have been prompted in large scale mediums like films. One such song was the Karishma-Govinda starrer song ‘Sarkhai lo khatiya jada lage’, though popular made my parents to switch of the television sets in case little guests had come home or worse watch those movements danced to the dance number. I am sure Karishma now would never think of this song and she would get amnesia if someone mentioned that she had danced to this song.

Forget 2000 onwards; if one thinks of the era of great lyricists like the 50s-70s, I wonder if lyricists like Majrooh Sultanpuri or Shailendra would ever find a job of writing even one song in the current lyricist’s generation. Could they attempt to write in their wildest dreams lines like ‘Shaam ko daaru, Raat ko ladki’ from ‘Shoot out at Lokhandwala’ or ‘Kal meri skirt keechega’ from ‘Dum Maaro Dum’?

If people argue that rocking music can substitute for nonsensical or crude lyrics then we do not need poets. Obviously the need of the hour then is those who can write songs which are controversial and blend it with foot tapping beats. Better sill write songs that can make children and teenagers smirk when parents try to switch off the radio or TV set. Another opportunity for children to show they can rebel by listening or lip-syncing to such songs!

As I left my friend’s place in my car, the RJ on the radio announced the top 10 songs and the one that had been on my mind however much I detested all morning came back again. This time however I decided to accept it as a phase that will soon pass as I thought one needs such songs to cherish good from bad.

This was written for right in the middle column on editorial page.

Breeze through with baby

Deccan Herald, ,

Vacations can be stressful for new moms who want to take that break, but worry whether they will be able to handle a cranky baby in a new place.

Dr Meena Menon, eye specialist, offers sound advice:  “As long as the baby is healthy, I am all for the new mum to go out and take a short holiday whenever she can. If possible I would suggest that the parents take take a third person along, like a relative or house help, so that the mother can relax.”

Roopa Rangaswamy, HR professional, admits that the first trip with baby always unveils new learnings! “The trick is not to be aggressive about your holiday schedule,” she says, adding that one must be prepared to enjoy fewer outings in a day.

Dr Meena Jain, child and adolescent psychologist, argues that unless there is a strong support system, like a care-giver or a very understanding husband who is ready to share responsibilities, a holiday is bound to be stressful for both baby and mom.

But Dr Hari Priya insists that holidays in the initial years of baby’s life bring happiness and adjustment. “I suggest that parents make short trips and ensure the child is well-fed. Keep meal times regular,” she says.

Here’s what you need to ensure:

  1. Carry enough baby supplies and essentials, be it in clothes, diapers or formula.
  2. Be flexible with your schedule and understand that a baby will not identify with your idea of a holiday like trekking excursions or shopping sprees!
  3. Try to visit places that are less crowded.
  4. It maybe worthwhile to carry a stroller or a baby sling to make commuting easy in a new destination.

Hundreds of things to Do!

Reshma's Blog

Donning many hats and yet longing to do lots more things. Nothing new to my personality. It is not just one thing that I am currently handling in my personal and professional life (trying to get that established firmly after a little one voila!). As much as I am loving to do few steps that will help me in my professional world tomorrow, there are many times during the day when I feel am left behind than my own expectations.

One thing that motherhood has taught me is to have enormous amount of patience and I think that is helping me feel that one day I will be able to lead my life as I want, achieve what I want and even then take care of my child. Until then it is taking few baby steps in professional world trying to scout for freelance assignments.

We all change over a period of time don’t we? A decade ago I was this ambitious girl thinking nothing will stop me not marriage not motherhood but then it all changed with time. No regrets but today I want to make everything work and right now full time career is yet to take shape as getting my child adjusted to the outside world is taking time. And until he is going to be fine I can’t imagine me being fine at my office. Nevertheless I am very confident my career will ‘happen’ this year with the co-operation of my family and my child.

For those who read this post does it seem like a personal letter out? I can say that I am just pouring my feelings and hoping I am going to be much stronger after writing this.
If you read this all I can say that thanks for reading it and be in touch.
Bye

Search, Click and Cook

General Thoughts

Be it a recipe from your grand mother’s cooking that is lost or that French recipe that you so loved but couldn’t get hold of when you were in Paris, it is all just a click away. And the Food bloggers have formed a community of their own, finds out Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma.

Not that cooking is only a woman’s forte but many amongst us do land in the kitchen either for ourselves or for our near and dear ones. Traditionally women would either try their hand in new culinary skills after going through books or try to get information from an expert in cooking. Today thanks to web world, things have changed. With the gamut of information available on food on Internet, videos popping up on food blogs, women perceive cooking in a new dimension altogether.

She could try to scout for a traditional recipe that reminds of grandma’s cooking or look for a dish that she had last evening at a multi cuisine restaurant. Says Shreya Mehta, Product manger, Levis women’s bottom wear, “Earlier it used to be referring cookery books to try something special but now whenever I do find time over weekends all I need to do is go to my favourite food blog and try to churn that perfect dish that I have had over the week at a friends‘s party or restaurant, all at fingertips.”

On one hand surfing on the Internet for recipes is making many urban women explore the experimentation streak in them by trying new cuisines. There are others too who are equally passionate about cooking but they go one step ahead and publish their own food blogs. These women find their own food domains a resource centre for others who seek tips on cooking. This space is a learning sphere for those who write on food and create a resource centre for those who want to have a reference of traditional and new age cuisines and connect with like minded people.

For Nagalaxmi a professional with Google Singapore who enjoys posting on her food blog cookingandme.com says that while the blog gave the venue to express her passions food, photography and writing, she made many new friends from the blogging world. “The best part about this is, there’s a community of food bloggers that stay in touch, irrespective of where they are located, and organize regular food blogger meets in their respective cities. I have made many friends online whom I’ve never met in real life. And yes, most of them are Indians, although not all are based in India.” She says

Owner of popular food blog aayisrecipes.com, Shilpa.S says, “I love cooking. It calms me down and acts as a stress buster. In the beginning it was to create reference of my mother’s (aayi’s) recipes. Also I would blog to share my recipes with friends who always asked for these recipes.” Pointing out on the reason why she thinks women search for recipes, she says, “I think staying away from home makes people miss their roots. They miss what they had when they were kids and delicacies prepared by their mothers or grand mothers. It’s the idea of just thinking or reading about these dishes make them nostalgic and emotionally happy. And I have noticed from my interactions, that most of the people that read my blog are from similar background as mine. So they connect with me.”

While there are a good number who search for traditional recipes like on aayisrecipes.com Nagalaxmi has a different point of view on why women come to her blog. “I feel like if someone wanted a traditional or family recipe, their moms or aunts are only a phone call away. I see people turning to the Internet when they want to go beyond what they grew up eating. International cuisines and baking, in the case of Indians, is what drives most people online to research and find recipes. Most people ask for baking recipes like egg less cakes, substitution for ingredients not available in India, etc. I think the trend is to rely on your parents or grandparents for the traditional, family recipes and the Internet for cuisines you are not familiar with but want to experiment on.”

Suma Rowjee an avid baker, who maintains a food blog, sumarowjee.blogspot.com feels that the well traveled women with access to different cuisines are more open to trying out new things in the kitchen.  She adds that women these days are willing to add a streak of experimentation in her attitude towards food. For Madhuri Kumar, an architect and teacher by profession, having her own blog, cookcurrynook.wordpress.com is another aspect of her persona. She mentions that she has always been fascinated with cooking since a young age. She likes to search and put her own recipes on the Internet just to be in tab with the latest cooking trends.

Recipes on the internet are also inexpensive. Cookbooks even though are more appealing with photographs are a huge investment.

While there are many who search the Internet through various search engines there are others too in sizeable numbers who are passionate about food and they are using a source the Internet to post their enriched experience in the form of recipes. While some ask these bloggers on traditional recipes like on aayisrecipes, there are host of others who want to try International cuisines and the best source is a good food blog that is interactive, appealing and comes to the rescue anytime.

Some of the popular websites frequented by women who consider cooking to be their passion are tarladala.com, sanjeevkapoor.com, http://smittenkitchen.com/, http://www.passionateaboutbaking.com/,http://www.whatsforlunchhoney.net/ to mention a few.

Older, wiser, merrier

General Thoughts

Retired life no longer means just playing with grandchildren and laid back days for women today. Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma meets a bunch of spirited women who have taken up activities as varied as trekking and artificial floral decorations to fill in all the free time on hand.

Playing computer games, pubbing, hanging out at cafes with friends or for that matter tweeting – for the 50-something women, these probably sound too immature. Or perhaps brings the thought ‘been there done that’. On the other hand, activities like shopping, taking a nap or watching television are just too boring and clichéd.

Padmini Balaram with the Zambian dancers at Victoria falls, Zambia.
Padmini Balaram with the Zambian dancers at Victoria falls, Zambia.

While they do occasionally enjoy a shopping spree or that afternoon nap, several educated urban women above 50 are choosing other creative activities that help them to learn something new on a regular basis and maintain hobbies that get them soul satisfaction. These are enthusiastic women who now have fewer responsibilities in the family, are as tech-savvy as their younger counterparts and are keen to do something creative in life. Undoubtedly they are enjoying their personal time in envious ways, unlike others who feel retired life is meant for relaxing at home.

Writing books, poetry, painting, travelling with other women, and volunteering for NGOs are just a few amongst a host of interesting activities. The freedom to do things at their pace and with lesser burden of looking after the family are making homemakers and those pursuing professional interests rekindle their passions and utilise their personal time for something resourceful.

Padmini Balaram is in her sixties and enjoys travelling alone or with other women across the globe and paints at leisure. She says, “I have had my time toiling away in a bank. Now that I have retired, I love to do glass painting or ceramic stuff, something I used to do occasionally when I was in the bank. As for travelling it gives me immense joy to go to lesser popular tourist destinations. In fact, I feel as human beings we should never stop learning. I have also joined music classes recently.”

It is not that they do not spend time with their children and grandchildren, or spend lazy days at home. But age certainly hasn’t slowed them down or made them give up their interests. Take for instance Indira Nadig. She has tried her hand at writing poetry, making artificial floral arrangements, acting in movies, and has also started a women’s club, all when in her sixties. Today at 65, she is eager to learn new things every day. She makes floral arrangements in her garage, which doubles up as her boutique, and sells them to a variety of clients in India and abroad.

Says Indira, “I find every floral arrangement to be an expression, like the poems I write. Age doesn’t really matter when you want to learn and do something new every single day. It is not that I don’t spend time with my granddaughter or do what most others do at my age. But if you ask me, it is essential for someone to have their own identity rather than just be someone’s wife or mother.”

Indira has a word of advice for all those women who are entering their fifties. “Women are generally busy with household, family, children and even career until they reach 50. After that, one has the option of remaining idle and losing precious time, or to learn something new or take up a hobby that gets your mind involved creatively,” she says.

Shyla Kurma, who is 50 and has trekked in several destinations like Sikkim, Uttaranchal and Coorg, says, “I have always been a career person but now I take breaks so that I can trek, be with nature, breathe air that is pure and I love that solitude. If you have the health, an understanding family and the money to take up something innovative, just go for it.”

It really doesn’t seem to matter if you lost time with multiple responsibilities pulling you down when you wanted to take up hobbies in your younger years. There is still plenty of time to catch up.

(This article written by me was published at: http://www.justfemme.in/leisure-after-fifty )

Tell me how

The Hindu
Answers In maternity studios Photo: Shaju John
Answers In maternity studios Photo: Shaju John

Couples taking counselling for marriage has been there forever. With globalisation, parenting also seems to have a manual. There is a wealth of information to be had from different sources. Now there are child birth educators and counsellors to take you through ante and post-natal classes. Motherhood studios have mushroomed in metros and parents are making a beeline for them.

Along with information, these studios offer yoga and Lamaze classes, access to fitness programs. Baby care includes information on massage, tips to put baby to sleep, calming an unsettled baby right from the first three months till the little one is around two years old.

Pointing to the changing scenario that leads parents to turn to professional help, Rakhi Kapoor who owns Dwi Studio says: “Nuclear families with both parents working, frequently lead to parenting issues as such and even in cases where the mother is a stay-at-home mom, the lack of support from family members leaves parents clueless as to how they to manage their children.”

Child psychologist, Mina Dilip says: “Parenting has undergone a sea change in the last few years. Our ancestors led simpler lives than we do. Our lifestyles have become sedentary and stress levels are soaring. As a result, more and more people seek professional advice to help them cope.”

Elders love to shower advice, but disagreements in parenting styles leave couples looking for other answers.

It is not just individuals who are trying to establish their hold in this high potential area. Even retail spaces sense an opportunity and have moved into baby care. Mahindra Retail Pvt. Ltd. with Mom’s Lounge offers information from pregnancy to post child birth and includes access to a child psychologist to deal with baby blues. Says it’s Business Head, child birth educator and pregnancy specialist, Anika Puri: “We have from the very start seen ourselves as providing a complete solution. We also provide free advice twice a week in the form of parenting forums in all our stores where our customer can access childbirth professionals and seek tips and advice.”

Today, motherhood and parenting has an entire market tailored around it. Becoming a mother today is seen as a phase that needs counselling, professional help and a stage that a woman can associate with herself and her baby.

Voice over SMS

General Thoughts

Well…. have been busy writing something for a online publication. Am yet to complete it, hopefully should be done with it with the required photographs by Monday. In the meantime I have been observing one trait of mine that may seem strange to many who do not know me very well. I generally prefer sending SMSes rather than talking to that person..  Even with the best of friends that I have, I generally land up speaking to people only when something is essential. I somehow think the solitude of a text message is good for me and the other person without disturbing the other person at once. I know it may sound funny or strange that I love sending SMSes of ‘how are you’ rather than speaking.  Especially because I have been a RJ, but who cares.?That’s me.

For that matter I can’t write if music is played at the background while I have played countless songs as a RJ,  but while I am a radio host nothing else matters and when I am writer; it is just writing in peace not music to influence or inspire me.

Now coming back to love for SMS , I think a text message has its own charm. God bless that person who invented a text message!

U have any thoughts on this, let me know