| What bothers me is when people assume I do not know Kannada. | |
| It has always been that either my complete name or my face makes people guess and, as an instinct response, makes them speak the language they believe could be linked to my lingua franca. And that has been everything, except the real one.
Perhaps there are many others like me who have a name that does not reveal their identity in terms of religion, caste. To add to the confusion some faces force people to assume. When I was in college, people would often approach me and ask:?Are you an Anglo-Indian, Gujarati, Muslim and so on. I never objected to this guessing game since I found it amusing and thought it added a certain mystery to my persona. Off late though, since the way I way dress up, I have been spoken to a number of times in Hindi, and when I replied back in Kannada, the coconut vendor or bus conductor and the flower seller would be taken by surprise. Recently, an attendant at a cash counter in a mall asked “Kannada ata hai kya?”. When I snapped out of the thought I was engrossed in, I questioned:?“Barutte, adare Kannadalle keli nange baruto illuvo anta?” I?have nothing against the national language as it is one of the languages I speak and use everyday. What bothers me is when people assume I do not know Kannada and speak only English. Even autorickshaw drivers look at me differently when I respond to them in Kannada. I?have often discussed with friends that they should speak in Kannada, for, others might respond in the same language. But some of them would quip, saying Bangaloreans take pride in speaking all languages and can even sense what linguistic background others are by simply sizing them up. By this logic they conclude that Bangaloreans are cosmopolitan. While all this might be true why don’t we speak in Kannada to the person in front of us and if they don’t understand then we could always switch to another language. Maybe that would make us Bangaloreans more understanding in speaking a variety of languages while not abandoning our own. Else, the opportunity of speaking this state’s primary language will be lost to us. So while Kannada Prasara Parishath takes pride in teaching lakhs of students over the years their month tongue, what we as citizens can do is not to impose the language on others. And yet we must make an attempt to speak in Kannada as often as possible — if not at the workplace, at cafeterias when among friends, with shop vendors, the bus conductor and, of course, with people who enjoy speaking Kannada. Published under Right in the Middle Column in Deccan Herald on November 23, 2011 |
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Category Archives: Reshma’s Blog
ETERNAL DILEMMA;The great balancing act
Managing a career is no smooth sailing with the arrival of your bundle of joy. How do scores of women do it, anyway? Reshma Krishnamurthy Sharma tries finding out
An increasing number of women living in cities and metros are career focused. However, with the arrival of a baby much changes in a woman’s life.
Many of them opt to stay at home, while those who are keen to go back to work start out with a part time job or do freelance assignments. Does motherhood mean a stop to careers even for those women who are highly career centric? Or, are there options to manage the baby and focus on one’s career prospects?
Many women admit that motherhood brings a sea change in their lives, so a career for a large number of them, is not the immediate priority. While there are some who leave high profile jobs to become stay-at-home moms, there are quite a few who join work for various reasons.
Says Shreya Rao, Product Manager, Levis India, “I wanted to start work as I did not want to feel left behind in my career. Taking care of the baby for a year full time was fine. After that, however, I wanted to get back to work. Initially, it was good, but later I couldn’t do justice either to my job or to my child. So, after a year I took a break and joined work only when my child started going to pre-school for a longer duration of time.”
In a country where raising a child is considered a woman’s duty, the elders at home too advice the new mother to take time off her job, however high her position or salary may be. But, do all women go through the dilemma of whether to resume work at the earliest or embrace motherhood for life?
Asserting her decision to resume work within six months of her son being born, Mangai Varadrajan, a project manager at a leading software company, says “When you have a good family support system, I think it is important that the woman goes back to work so as to make her feel good in life. In my case, my family and my in-laws supported me whole-heartedly and I don’t regret going back to work. But if you are happy being a stay-at-home mother then it is entirely your decision.”
Padma Srinivas, a HR consultant who is trying out freelance, consciously decided to take a break from work to look after her baby. She balances her work and life by taking up fewer projects.
Having strong family support, and the ability to manage resources in terms of arranging for a caretaker to look after the baby at home, or to get the child to spend a few hours at a day care centre, allows women the option to get back to their careers or at least look for part time or freelancing opportunities.
Before you decide to rejoin the workforce, either full time or part time, ask yourself the following questions:
*How long are your working hours? Working long hours is bound to make you exhausted and irritable. Your child will not be able to understand this and will want to be with you when you get back home. So, whatever the working hours make sure to spend time effectively with your child.
*How much flexibility do you have at work? If your child is ill, will your boss or colleagues be able to understand it? Would you want to give some more time for this phase to pass before heading back to work?
*Can you arrange alternate resources in case your regular back up support system fails? If the normal care giver has to deal with an emergency, would you be able to take care of your child and still manage piled up work and meet deadlines?
*Are you sure you will be happy with your decision? Would you feel guilty about leaving your baby with a care giver? Be sure about what you want. You must be able to take off when you feel your child needs you the most.
According to Career Counselor Janet Parameshwar, “Try to choose a work place that is woman friendly; where you are valued as a professional but where your position as a mother is also understood. Also, in case you are not able to immediately join work because of various reasons, then, whenever you join make sure to be updated with the latest developments in the industry and try to start work at the earliest.”
However she has a word of caution, “Whatever you decide, do not neglect your child at the cost of your career. Believe in yourself; If you are talented opportunities will definitely come by.”
So, if you are confident of getting the right resources arranged to take care of your baby, then there is no one to stop you. But, experts opine that accepting fewer responsibilities at the beginning and lesser hours at work — even if it means a pay cut — makes more sense towards maintaining a work-life balance.
However, if you do feel that you deserve to be in a high profile position make sure you’re guilt-free and get the right resource to take care of your baby. As someone rightly said a happy woman makes a happy mother, so take the plunge after enough thought about you and the baby.
Published in She page of Living supplement of Deccan Herald on November 12th 2011
http://www.deccanherald.com/content/204056/balancing-act.html
A voice who touched us is no more
I am sure you must be amongst millions of fans who just adored Jagjit Singh, who got goose bumps when you listened to certain lines sung by Jagjit Singh on the CD or on the radio. Sad that he had more than one personal tragedies and perhaps that made him sing sad songs that could tear anyone’s heart.
He was not of young age so I cannot really say I wish he could live for another twenty years. So I do accept his demise as though he had to go one day and he was after all above 60 .
All I can say is Jagjist Singhji may you be in peace. I have got compliments from my listeners when I have played your songs on radio. It was you singing and people said I had great taste in playing these songs. Huh. Thanks for touching my life more than one way. I had the good fortune to listen to you even at a live concert and I just admired the voice.
God bless and be happy wherever you are.
ENTERTAINMENT – DOES IT NEED A NEW DEFINITION IN BANGALORE?
When it comes to entertainment in Bangalore many might voice out that munching a grub at a café or fine dining restaurant or even at a food court just before a movie show is the most preferred option. But are most of these people happy with this option of eating out or do they want more options? With a city that has truly adapted different cultures, lifestyles and various cuisines, is entertainment defined in terms of merely to fill hunger pangs or can more options be explored in the city.
For Priya Sebastian, an illustrator living in the city finds most of the entertainment options suited for the younger generation. Nevertheless she finds eating out as one of the most convenient and apt options to go out with her small set of close friends as she finds good food and great conversations a great combination.
While some may find fine dining or ‘eating out’ as a convenient option there are a few who find this more overrated and suited for those who dare not try newer options or interests. Says Mallika Balu, corporate trainer, “I generally look forward to my weekend trekking outings. And if it is not for a trek then I am game anytime for watching movies or browsing at various book stores. Though I do indulge in going out to eateries once or twice a month by itself dining out has never has really fancied me too much as an entertainment option.”
While Priya finds the dire need of people to visit art galleries and cultivate it as a regular leisure outing she thinks that cultural activites like those interested in western classical music should have scope and to be staged accessible venues in many areas of the city rather than one major cultural venue like Chowdiah Memorial Hall. On the other hand Mallika opines that time restriction not only hampers eating out entertainment options but production houses that stage theatre plays start early and end early while the ideal thing would be to let people attend a play even late in the evening and catch up with friends post a play.
Time restrictions seem to be a great matter of concern for a sizeable number who find the very base of entertainment in a cosmopolitan city like Bangalore gets a beating due to this issue. Says Gauri Kapur, make up artist and stylist, “Thinking of going out on a weekend seems too very painful, due to traffic and lack of good happening parties. Also people seem to get concentrated in one happening party which can get irritable. Another major problem in Bangalore is the time restriction that seems to work adverse with someone like me who want a good night life.” She further reasons out that as other than star hotels almost all eating joints are closed by 11.30pm which makes one wonder what kind of entertainment does the city offer?
Increased spending power, lifestyle changes and need to utilize time in varied interests are making people to look for different kinds of entertainment sources. While youngsters are content with the existing ones those who are exposed to art music or late night parties want the city to change its fabric to cater to wider audiences. Like for someone like Swapna S, an engineering student, Bangalore has definitely become one of the most happening places with so many malls and eat out joints coming up very fortnight.
Not to forget many opine that it is high time Bangalore gets out of the tag of being a pub city or eat out city to more entertainment options showcased at accessible venues that promise to cater not only the teeny weenie’s but also 30 plus generation.
So if one thought it’s all about dining and dancing is all that people of Bangalore want to spend their leisure hours then one is sure to be mistaken as most Bangaloreans want different interests to be explored
LANGUAGE DOES MATTER
Note before you read this piece. This particular article and three more were pending for approval with a news editor but I think it’s high time I get them to be read.
Sandhya an architect by profession calls out for her two year old daughter to come inside the house and play and the chubby toddler replies in a language that was never her grandma’s or even her mother’s original native language. With society changing its face in the form of globalization, English has entered our lives in way it is almost becoming our primary language. In addition with curriculums being dictated and taught in Queen’s language urban Indians are increasingly speaking to their children in English rather than their own native language
In the last decade modern India has witnessed an upsurge in intercaste marriages and this maybe one reason why parents feel it is better to communicate in one universal language that is accepted globally rather than speaking to the kid in two regional languages. Moreover with colleges and workspaces having one unifying language which is English, it is conveniently spoken amongst couples and passed on to children.
Some may consider it to be a surprise that a language when traced down in the country’s history is actually a contribution of invaders is grabbing more attention than any other regional language in urban India. But for couples who speak in this language more than their own mother tongues feel it is the influence of globalization and many admit they have grown up thinking and speaking in English and that habit is continued with children too. This also maybe a trend in cities like Bangalore where the culture that predominates itself is cosmopolitan and the result is that it is people have adopted modern lifestyles so how language could be left behind?
Says Shiril Pinto, a HR professional, “I am in a mixed marriage where my mother tongue is Konkani and my husband’s is Bengali but because we were unable to learn each other’s languages we have resorted to speak to our three old kid in English. Also as we have always communicated to each other prior to marriage in this language so it just continued as a natural progression of communication at home.”
There are other reasons like being educated in convent schools and the belief that children who are able to speak in flawless English right from young age are able to work in global environments much better with the diction, grammar and pronunciation having leant perfectly from young age.
This is the case of Smitha Roy who feels speaking in English to her two plus daughter Aahna is something which is natural as she and her husband have always spoken in English as a matter of convenience. She further adds, “However one thing we make sure is that Aahana learns correct language skills so that her diction, pronunciation is by far the best. Yet we are ensuring she learns Kannada as well from her grandparents whenever she visits them at their place, as I don’t want her to feel when she’s grown up that she did not get the opportunity to learn any other language very well other than English”
According to Nandini Ashok an educator who runs a preschool, “I think one reason is there is an increase in mixed marriages. Another reason for rising popularity of English is parents these days generally find he interview process at the kindergarten level a procedure cumbersome enough where he or she is spoken and interview in English as the primary language. This according to me is unfair to the child and in a certain way pressurizes parents to speak in English. “
If one thinks it is the case of intercaste marriages which India has witnessed as a boom factor to be the contributor for speaking in English a parent like Chaitra Kiran has another perspective to offer. “I do speak in Kannada and am very much married within the same community. Yet I feel parents like me have started stressing on English is because we see children are not able to understand anything if they are not on par with this language and somehow it has become the unifying language in activity centres, play areas like in upscale apartments and so on
Many consider that it is a fact that malls or kids activity centres or for that matter schools communicate in English as it is easier to converse in one language rather than multiple languages. Though they may help children to understand though other languages as well it is obviously the Queen’s language that is gaining prominence in places like bookstores, preschools and this is indirectly making parents speak in English.
Yet undeniably the bottom line is that given the choice urban Indians want to focus on multiple languages mainly their` own native mother tongue as many feel children will be better quipped irrespective they live in India or elsewhere if they have knowledge of many languages.
Hoardings that can be bland yet catchy
I am doing good at my work and suddenly find myself thinking more on motherhood, pregnancy, parenting as that is part of my job profile. It’s a month since I have joined and I like what I am doing though I do feel at times I am perhaps doing more than my expected job profile, but then it’s all part of learning so good enough. However on a personal note, I have realized, I am going to be fine only if my little one is going to be fine at day care, emotionally, physically and just healthy.
BTW the reason I wanted to write this piece is the hoardings of a jewellery brand that has caught my attention since the last few months. Unlike several jewellery brands except for one or two like Tanishq who use exquisite jewellery pieces and models. However I thought I had caught it wrong when around two months ago I saw a plain model with hardly any flashy jewellery noticeable showcased on a huge hoarding of Ganjam.
I thought it was one of the pictures and it vanished from my mind soon. But recently another one with another plain looking model with just her hair focused and the piece of jewellery on it. This I felt was too bland compared to bangle melas and models in other jewellery brands that deck up in gold more than they clothe themselves. Ganjam’s recent hoardings are too bland but hey… maybe that’s the idea. Be apart from the rest. And yes bland can catch attention too but donno if it will convert possible customers to walk into their showroom because of such hoardings.
Also it maybe an attempt to connect with modern women who want non fussy stuff rather than being decked up. Although I am fall into both categories, at times I do dress up like in a very traditional avatar including jewellery and sometimes one can catch me completely de glam and no accessories at all.
Come to think of it Ganjam’s recent hoardings do catch attention but I don’t think it will make people crave for their jewellery pieces as the models even though plain need to emote little more for a woman to connect with her and the jewellery brand.
New Beginning at a place where new life begins every day.
It’s good and strange feeling that I am back to be working in a corporate office even though it is part time for the present. After Rediffusion everything in a full time career seemed a bit boring. No offence for the agency as even today I consider it to be a good stint given the taste of reputed pr firm environment and the pay. But…I was not really enjoying what I was doing and I had to reinvent myself in terms of career growth. People have considered me to be foolish when seven years ago I had mentioned to them I have left my double digit salary for a job that hardly covered my expenses of going until there. But thanks to radio I had a new high in life and new confidence that proved to me you can be polished and be a good RJ even though you don’t sound husky!
I am writing this post as I have joined Cloud Nine (earlier Cradle) hospital, a specialized maternity hospital as their Communication consultant. It’s a small start as I work only part time here but I am definitely hoping to do better and get a better designation and career prospect through this role. Again I guess all my PR skills, writing skills, imaginative skills are coming to test and let’s see how I fare in it. I am going to be seeing lots of babies, mums to be and writing lots of stuff on parenting for Cloud Nine.
Incidentally my little one was born in the same hospital almost two years ago and now it’s kind of coming back home.
Keep you posted on more such things. I will be continuing to write for other publications even though the frequency might go down a bit. Wish me luck and thanks for reading this.
Bandhini: Creating fine masterpieces
Traditional Craft
Fabric in vibrant hues, bandhini, also known as bandhej, enjoys popularity not only on the streets of Rajasthan and Gujarat, but all over the world too.
The rich colours have a huge sense of appeal for buyers and they instantly symbolise a certain element of Indianness for the person wearing it. The origin of this fabric has an interesting history weaved into it.
The word bandhini means “to tie” and is derived from Sanskrit. While some believe that Muslim Khatri women brought this art form to Kutch, a few others in Rajasthan believe that artists from Neelgar and Chippa communities were the original practitioners of this art form.
Interestingly, this tie-and-dye art has evolved over the years and today bandhini fabric is available in various forms — sarees, lehengas, cholis, dupattas, scarves, stoles, shawls, skirts, and even bed spreads and cushion covers. No wonder, this traditional art form has found its way into the glamorous world of fashion and films too.
It is said that the process of producing bandhini cloth is one among the oldest crafts of the world. It is a skilled task where the artisan has to initiate the process of creating a bandhej fabric either with malmal cotton or georgette which is folded to a quarter of its size. The cloth is then placed on a table and desired designs are marked using a wooden block dipped in red colour known as geru in Kutch.
This process is alternatively done by placing a clear thin sheet of plastic pierced with pin holes on this fabric and then transferring the imprint of the desired pattern on to the fabric using the thin sheet. A rag dipped in geru is then washed over the sheet, leaving an imprint of the desired pattern on the cloth. The craftsperson then pulls a small area of the fabric where each hole is placed and winds the thread tightly to form a tiny knot.
Hundreds of such knots are formed to retain the original colour in that portion. The cloth is then washed to remove the imprint and dipped in yellow or other lighter colours.
Following this, the fabric is rinsed, squeezed and tied and then dipped in a darker colour. After the last step in the dyeing process, the cloth is washed and, if necessary, starched. The folds are then pulled apart in a particular way, releasing the knots and revealing their pattern.
Traditionally, only natural colours were used, but today, the colour scheme involves the usage of synthetic colours for faster results and bulk production. According to Abdul Kayam, owner of a small manufacturing unit of bandhej in Jaipur, “Synthetic colours are used to save on time. Women do the tying using their nails that are specifically grown long for this purpose or a spiked metal ring is used to lift and tie the tiny knots. Men do the dyeing as it involves a lot of labour. The entire process of tie-and-dye may take anything from two days to 45 days, depending on the design and embroidery involved.”
According to Raju Bhai Navrathan Makwana from Kutch, “The bandhini created in Gujarat varies from that of Rajasthan in terms of quality and design even though the process is the same.” In their book on world textiles, John Gillow and Bryan Sentance mention that bandhini was so popular in the 18th century that spotted scarves in English came to be called bandana.
Though bandhini is worn across India on every possible occasion, in Gujarat and Rajasthan, the fabric is associated with certain special occasions. For instance, Gujarati women wear bandhini saris known as garcholas only for weddings. However, for the artisans, bandhini is not only a source of livelihood, but a reflection of their rich culture.
This was published under Sunday Herald ( from Deccan Herald) on July 10, 2011 under Arts and Culture page.
To go to the link click here http://www.deccanherald.com/content/174900/bandhini-creating-fine-masterpieces.html
DO YOU HAVE ANY ISSUE?
It was after many years that I had decided to continue my studies and after filling the admission form I was at the table who was getting the registrations done for a post graduation course particularly in English. As I waited for the documents to be filled, the gentleman in front of me asked “So you are working?” I said “Yes I am an independent writer.” Then came the next question “You are married?” I smiled and said yes. I was wondering if these questions had anything to do with my intention to do the course. It was the final question that made me think in general, how the so called English speaking population speak in India?
“Do you have any issue?” The question made me say to myself. I have several issues in life. But how would you really help me out if my maid has not turned up at the right time or I am stressing myself trying to multi task things. Suddenly it hit upon me he was asking if I had any child?
I reluctantly said yes, not sure if this was the answer to the question, “One”. He said “ha, you are sure you will be able to study further and work with a small child?” As I agreed in positive nod and got up from there the conversation set me thinking of specific Indian English terms which only we Indians can mange to understand. Like the usage of the word co–brother. I believe this is more often used in south India and has got the distinct ability to be referred one of the unique Indian words. It refers to one’s wife’s sister’s husband. Other words that can be categorized truly Indian are words like time pass or a word that had my boss at my first job when I was a twenty something fuming at me on her bad day at work. I even now remember her fuming and saying “Can’t you say eraser instead of rubber? That sounds so polished.” Eraser is something that will never erase from my memory.
For that matter words that have come of age are found in the books that you buy for your child or the recipes you read on blogs will make you learn that brinjal is no longer cool. It is after all called the eggplant.
As I made my way towards another office where I had some work I was called out “Aunty! the line starts here. Please come here.” I said why don’t you call me Ma’m instead of Aunty and she was in no mood to listen. With a sigh I did realize Uncle and Aunty were amongst hundreds of other words that will take a long time to be replaced by other words in this country. Until then we have to accept these words and phrases as uniquely Indian understood by Indians.
Convenience the mantra for modern day living
The single most element that has come to rule urban living is convenience. Be it in communication, travel, food, clothing and even parenting, people do certain things as it is the most convenient thing to do and makes life simple and easy. A brief research is presented here as to how modern day lifestyle is increasingly governed by convenience.
This was the idea I had thought of writing for a publication. The newspaper had even approved it but it never got published. I found this piece recently and felt like putting this atleast on my blog. Hope you have a good read.
Increasingly life in a metro seems to be governed by one single factor and it points out to ‘convenience’. Every aspect of our living has come to be engulfed by this major factor as it is perceived to makes life easy. People do not mind going heavier on the pocket to adopt a convenient lifestyle. Whether it shopping, travel, clothing, household chores or for that matter even parenting has embraced convenient living. Either it is to save time or lead relaxed life or it is believed that convenience is luxury affordable. Is it that people want to do anything to be stress free or are there more things to be done than ever before, hence convenience is the obvious answer to modern day living?
City bred people have found ease of life in concepts like supermarkets, malls, satellite channels as each one of them promised convenience more than anything for the hectic lifestyle of urban living. If one were to understand, people believe this is something that is become next to our daily routine just as we eat drink or breathe. Be it gadgets, utility elements or routines; modern day lifestyle has made urbanites seek convenience in every form.
Using one’s own vehicle is perceived to be better than public transport as it saves time and is handy even though it may turn to be expensive. Even the role of a homemaker has changed with companies churning out innovative appliances every day to make her life easy.
The simple mode of communicating with each other has been taken over by fancy tools obviously as newer gadgets are convenient. Right from mobiles to Internet and palmtops traditional modes of communication like snail mails have become rarity as it is far more inconvenient in usage than modern technologies. Says Kauser Khan, Etiquette and grooming consultant, “ For me, technologies that have absolutely enhanced convenience are e-mail and cell phones. Whether it is for a professional or a personal need, even to keep track my children, these gadgets have turned to be the need of the time. They are precise and save considerable amount of time and it is easy for me to do more number of things in life.”
It is not just gadgets that people have started feeling that it has made life simple. Services that make sure utility products are at doorstep are a way of enhancing convenience. Says Vani Mahesh, Proprietor, Easylib.com, “ Starting an online library way back in 2001 was only to cater to an audience that understands convenience using technology. It is true that something like Internet has amazingly become as part of daily life like kitchen appliances. In our case getting books delivered home using technology or as part of premium service is only because Internet is no longer expensive and highly reliable.”
Affordability, rising incomes, improving standard of living has made people opt for services or usage of technologies that is perceived to enhance convenience. It may sound good to many but presenting slightly different viewpoint is Dr. Ali Khwaja, Career counselor, “ In the race of rushing against time and improving our standard of living I feel we are getting competitive, insecure and generally a sense of losing control over life. Hence, any gadget or activity that promises quick relief, flexibility, convenience, is being grabbed whatever may be the cost.”
Adding further he mentions, “Yet I do understand that the younger generation considers gadgetry as essential to their basic living, because they have never lived without it. I personally feel that the younger generation should be given an opportunity to know what it means to live without electronics and electricity, something like gadget free days to show that life can be led with much ease even without gadgets.”
For a young mother of two kids Shruthi Tripathi, “Convenience has embraced every aspect of our life and it is no surprise motherhood can be left behind. With women getting to work faster post motherhood, this phase of life has adopted many things to make the role of mother easier right from bottles to pacifiers and prams amongst host of other utility items.”
Obviously convenience is perceived differently by different people. Yet the rise in incomes, belief that it saves time and helps in happier living has made urbanites look for the c word in everything.
BY RESHMA KRISHNAMURTHY SHARMA